Daily Life

She is gone

2012-02-15T20:53:00.003-08:00

I really wish I had some good news to give about my friend Brandi but I don't. She lost her fight with CF this evening. Please pray for her family and friends. Her blog is located down and to the right of this post. It is called how to be a bankgrl.

I am just heartbroken. Days like these make me ask "Why? WHY???". There isn't an answer that will make me feel better and really it's not for us to understand.

Despite her health issues, Brandi lived life to the fullest. She always had a smile on her face. You would never know she was sick. She was smart and worked hard. She could have gotten on disability but that was not who she was. She loved her family dearly. Oh, and she loved her (as she would say) kittehs.

I have repeated this numerous times tonight but I still just can't believe it. Thank you lord this world is not my home!

Heartbroken

2012-02-14T20:35:00.001-08:00

I guess that's really not the title you expect to see on Valentine's Day and I really wish it weren't the case. My friend Brandi, who happens to also have a blog and whom I worked with in two different departments at the bank is fighting for her life tonight.

She has cystic fibrosis. She was in the hospital for what she calls a "tune up" and she got worse instead of better. Earlier today she was put on a ventilator and is in critical condition. Please say a prayer for and for her family. Understandably they are having a hard time and not ready to let her go. I really can't believe this is happening. And at the same time I always knew this day would come far to early.

Praying for a miracle!

Season of love!

2012-02-13T19:11:00.000-08:00

If there is a season of love, it would be February. And really, this is one those topics that keep coming up for me right now. I know, you're thinking, well duh Valentine's Day is tomorrow. But, I don't recall hearing these things last year or the year before. Maybe I heard them with my ears but not my heart. Very possible.

I realized from my study on Saturday that I should be intentional in being friends with people who I may not particularly like or care for. I should be nice to every person I come in contact with period. I should not judge them or have preconceived ideas of what they are like. Especially not having a fat clue as to what their life has been like. Pretty common sense but I need reminders sometimes.

Sunday's sermon was preached by our Youth Pastor and was called "Hallmarks of Love". It was a great message. Below are a few points from the notes:
The way in which we love others is a hallmark of our relationship with God.

The way in which we love others is a reflection of God's love expressed through the gospel.

The way in which we love others is a result of how we abide in the love of God.

The way in which we love others is empowered by the love of God.

When we realize just how much we are loved, it makes us want to love others. I'm going to work on being better at that!

Nothing to report here

2012-02-12T18:39:00.000-08:00

Well, after a much anticipated and talked about trip to see Billy the Exterminator Reese changed his mind!!! We got in the car and he said "Daddy, my tummy feels funny and I just want to go home and ride my four wheeler. I don't want to stand in line.".

Totally caught off guard but it did not hurt my feelings. As a matter of fact we went home and I fell asleep at 8:30. We are such part animals!

Saturday we had a great bible study. I will write about that later as well as the sermon that was preached today. Great, life changing stuff!

And speaking of life changing, I am actually watching the Grammy's. Luckily I have Bailey to tell me who all these cool people are because I have no clue. But I do know who Whitney is and I loved her when I was a kid. Such a talented artist and I am so sad she is no longer here. RIP Whitney, we will always love you!

Billy. The. Exterminator

2012-02-09T20:11:00.000-08:00

Reese Dean LOVES reality TV. Of course he doesn't even know what that means. I guess he gets it honest because I love it too!

Back in December he got to meet Troy and Jacob from Swamp People. He was thrilled! Tomorrow night we are going to the World of Wheels and Billy The Exterminator will be there. I just can't let Reese miss out.

Reese can pretty much recite lines from most episodes, he wears a chain on his pants (like Billy), carries around snake tongs and has even been known to cuss a little, just like Billy. The boy is pumped!!

Ive asked him a few times or 100, what he was going to say to Billy. His first response was:
"I'm going to ask Bill why he had a heart attack in that storage building.

I'm not sure he'll even say that but tonight I asked him again. he said "Mom, you've asked me that 1000 times already!". Well, I guess I'm turning into the Mom that asks a question, turns around and immediately forgets what the response was.

Oh well! Hopefully things will go well and i can post pictures later. Good night!

Thankful

2012-02-08T19:47:00.000-08:00

I have so many different things going on in my mind right now. Mostly thoughts and concerns for people I know that are hurting. I know that includes so many really all around the world.

I know that in these hard times God is working in a lot of hearts. He is also making things happen that are true miracles. I forget that sometimes. It's easy to get caught up in my circumstance and forget He is in control. But I am still clinging to the truth. Thank God for the many reminders to help me get through the day.

Religious, good or bad?

2012-02-07T19:20:00.000-08:00

I'll be honest with you, when I hear the word religious, my thoughts tend to go to the negative side. Before I became a Christ follower I thought of people who went to church every time the doors were open and seemed to have the perfect life and looked down on those that didn't. And if you have a different opinion than them you were "of the devil".

Now that I am on the other side, I hate to say my opinion hasn't changed much. Just the word turns people away and I can't really blame them. In a lot of cases, the religious folk act and do the same things non-religious people do, they just stand behind their religion and say it is ok because they are forgiven. And then we say "Those other people, you know the sinners, well they are going to hell in a hand basket". (best southern fake voice I can do)

But we have put that stigma on the word because we don't live out our religion! We should stand out and instead we blend in.

The Word religious means manifesting faithful devotion to an acknowledged ultimate reality or deity. Doesn't sound bad does it? Because it isn't. It would be like having a bad experience at a fast food restaurant (maybe that's not so far fetched) and saying all fast food hamburgers are bad based on one experience. That's just not fair. Besides we are all human and have bad days. So if you've had 1 bad experience or even more with religious people don't let that keep you from making the best decision you could ever make by making Jesus Lord of your life. Yeah, I know that sounds religious but He changed my life and I just don't know of a better way to put it :)

Lastly, an insert from today's study on James (Beth Moore).
You make up your mind who you want to be and daily die to the rest. You surrender yourself to living in the tension where you'll always be stretched and often broken. Religion pure and undefiled is grit without the grime. You accept that far easier ways to live exist, but you were born for nothing less.

This study is all up in my business

2012-02-06T19:42:00.000-08:00

So week 3's homework has been difficult to digest. But desperately needed.

Day 1 was on James 1:19, My dearly loved brothers, understand this: everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger.

I need help on this. And the funny thing is this lesson was on Sunday. This is the day of the week I usually have serious attitude issues and lose my patience the quickest. I love the fact that coincidences are not really coincidences but divine appointments. I've had lots of those lately. Those are the good days. The days I feel Him walking by side. Wonderful Savior!

I have some changin' to do

2012-02-05T20:05:00.000-08:00

Well, I guess I need to adjust my posting frequency. I know I said every single day but I think I'm going to have to change it to Sunday thru Thursday. Especially with ball season coming up and the fact that both kids will be playing. Still not sure how that's going to work.

Saturdays study on James was amazing and went right on along with the week I had. It talked about how joy and anguish can coexist. She also gave 2 examples of anguish.
Pain+anxiety=anguish
Suffering+dread=anguish

I think that accurately describes my emotional state right now. But, i know everything will work out according to God's plan.

There are two other points I would like to share.
Mental anguish can be like the mind in labor.

Anguish is meant to lead to a birth.

Don't give up, don't stop believing. Our pain will make us stronger and if we allow it, bring us closer to the God of the universe. I'm praying for a week of focusing on Jesus. A week of seeing Him work in many lives for His glory.

Happy Birthday to my little Ground Hog!

2012-02-02T19:44:00.000-08:00

Today is Reese's 5th birthday! Where has the time gone? Bailey was 5 when he was born and it just doesn't seem like either one of them should be 5 and 10.

I made him pancakes for breakfast, which are his favorite. Since he is allergic to eggs he doesn't eat cake so I made cake batter balls. He was so excited but after eating them he really didn't like them. He was so sweet though and told me it was ok, he would just eat the outside of it, which was a candy coating.

We went skating tonight and that didn't go as well as I planned. He was over confident thinking it would be easy but it wasn't. I was over confident thinking I had skated a bunch as a kid and it wouldn't be a big deal. We were both wrong! I busted it right away. I couldn't keep myself up and him too which resulted in a disaster. He still had fun and I'm sure we will do it again.

I did witness a pretty funny parent moment. The song "tootsie roll" came on. That was from back in the day so none of the kids paid attention to it. However, all around the room you could see the mommas dancing or at least moving a little. I have to admit I kinda wanted to break it down :). I guess I should have because my cool points were already in the negative at that point. Oh well, next time, if I can stay on my feet long enough!

I'm seeing a running theme.

2012-02-01T19:44:00.000-08:00

Words are not adequate to even begin to tell you what I've been through the last week. My last 2 posts have had the word overcome in them. I really feel the Lord speaking to me through that word.

Today I had another encounter with this word. At work I received info on the next sermon series in order to promote it. When I opened the email and saw it I cried. It is called "Overcoming". That is some powerful stuff!

A friend had me listen to a song by Kari Jobe called "Find You on my knees". If I could write a song right now it would say exactly what she is singing.

But I will find you in the place I'm in, find you when I'm at my end,
Find you when there's nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness.
You lift me up, you'll never leave me thirsty,
When I am weak, when I am lost and searching
I'll find you on my knees.

Beautiful song and I will add it to the list of songs you must find and listen to :)

Overcome

2012-01-31T18:56:00.000-08:00

So I am totally a fan of Jeremy Camp! I love just about anything he sings and he can sure enough sing. I heard one of his songs today that spoke to me. I have heard it before but today it just hit me. It's called Overcome. The lyrics are good but the music with it is powerful. If you don't know what song this is, please go to YouTube and search for it.

The last week or so it is crazy how certain bible verses have been jumping out at me and I'm seeing and hearing them at different times and different places. I could just cry when that happens.

I am just now realizing that the verse with overcome in it was the exact verse I talked about last night. Coincidence? I think not. It also wasn't a coincidence I heard that song today and it jumped out at me. Craziness!

I can so see the Lord working in my life. We are going through a difficult season right now. Fear and hopelessness keep trying to get in my mind. It makes me so mad when I even think about going there! Neither one of those things are a fruit of the spirit.

I am fully relying on God, the author and perfecter of my faith.

Consider it great joy....

2012-01-30T19:12:00.000-08:00

Consider it great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. James 1: 2-3.

Wouldn't it make you feel better if that verse said "Consider it great joy when your kids listen to you?". Or when lose a few pounds? Or when you catch a break?

But it doesn't and actually John 16:33 says 33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

It doesn't say IF you have troubles it says WHEN. I was never promised a cake walk but I am promised that he will never leave nor forsake me. In trying times, that is when I lean on Him and feel the closest to my heavenly father. I can't say I would change anything and give up those valuable times of learning and feeling peace.

There are a lot of people around me that are struggling. Me included. I am praying for healing, restoration and for God's hand to be upon these situations. I am believing in miracles tonight.

Dysfunctional Families

2012-01-29T19:03:00.000-08:00

I hear people say, we put the "fun" in dysfunctional family. There is nothing fun about it for sure but sometimes if you don't laugh about it you may just cry constantly. I would anyway.

Pastor Chris preached a great sermon today on that exact topic. I thought I would put the main points below.

God's grace changes hearts; it also changes homes!

Dysfunctional families lack spiritual leadership.

Dysfunctional families are driven by guilt, anger, and codependency.

Husband, what does it mean to love your wife?
Seeking her welfare above your own.
Honoring her in every decision, attitude, and action.
Being considerate in every word or deed.

Christian marriage is a skill to be developed, not a program to be downloaded.

Dysfunctional families are deficient in rules, boundaries, or recognized authority.

Good stuff for sure!

A little all over the place

2012-01-28T18:28:00.000-08:00

So I missed a day of blogging : (. By the time Friday rolls around I am so tired! I think all of us are because we never have a problem getting the kids to bed on Friday nights. I almost blogged a whole month straight.

With today being Saturday, the day started with the 2nd study of James. It was really good and I'm learning a lot. Really I'm learning how much I don't know. But that is ok, I will be learning for the rest of my life.

I will finish with a few Reeseisms.
Me: where did you get those markers, you're not supposed to have markers!
Reese: They are for my coloring book.
Me to Denson: Oh, they will only show up on his special coloring book, the won't show up on anything else.
Reese: Yeah, I tried writing on the wall and it didn't show up.
Busted!

Lately, he will precede a conversation with " I looked it up online......". He will also say "You know what's weird?". Im starting to realize he sounds just like me. Sometimes that's funny and other times it's embarrassing. Little ears are always listening.

Don't quit

2012-01-26T18:50:00.000-08:00

I received an email early in the week that had a speech by Dr. Kevin Elko. I'm not familiar with this guy but I really liked what he had to say. It is a little lengthy but well worth the read. Here it is!

Don’t Quit

Sitting at last year's Super Bowl, I realized that the night before, during my motivational talk to the Green Bay Packers, I had omitted an important point. So I sent this text to the Head Coach for his halftime locker room message: Great boxers never try to knock out their opponent. Great boxers just try to get a little cut on their opponent's face and then for the rest of the fight they work the cut. Survive all assaults and keep working the cut.

So at halftime the coach said, "We are up on the Steelers, but they are a strong team. Survive all assaults and keep working the cut." The Steelers did, in fact, come back and started to mount up some steam, but the Packers did what their coach taught them: survived the assault and kept working the cut.

Likewise, effective parents gather momentum with a child, feeling as if their words are being heard and that the child will "turn out" fine; but then come the teenage years. However, the parents need to keep pouring themselves into the child, and usually in more times than not, if the parents keep Working the cut and survive all assaults, something interesting happens. For example, in the story of the prodigal son, we read, “He [the son] came to himself,” a very interesting phrase. The prodigal son did not understand the error of his ways "outside of himself," but rather he reached inside to the teachings and beliefs that had been placed there by his parents. Parents, survive all assaults and keep working the cut.

A friend running a small business for three years feels that he's in a rut. And his office manager quit because of challenges she was having at home with her son and another employee died of cancer all in the same week. He feels discouraged and wonders if he is getting anywhere. But now is the time is keep punching.

There is a perception that there is something called overnight success; in reality, that success takes about ten years. To all of you creating your dream, realize once you have a dream and start building it, life is not easier but, in fact, harder. Think of the Israelites; as soon as they had a dream of freedom, they got attacked by everybody and anybody. While they were slaves, living someone else’s life, nobody challenged them. So keep working the cut and survive all assaults. You may just have a bad reality of what building a dream is.

The problem here is emotions. We think emotions are important. Emotions tell us to quit, to have an affair, to think life is over, to believe nobody is suffering but you. Emotions lie. Keep doing the right thing, work the cut, and your emotions will catch up with you. I used to love it when people would tell me they love who they are with but are not in love with themselves – emotional hogwash and Hollywood propaganda. This thought is emotions again. Go ahead and make a decision off of your insane emotions and then get ready for your next emotion, regret.

The answer is in Galatians 6:9 and the words of the Apostle Paul, "If you do not grow weary in doing well you will reap in due season if you faint not." If you keep going, survive all assaults and work the cut, you will eventually reap. What if your frustration and fatigue are not a sign that you are getting nowhere but rather a sign that you are getting close, and if you push through the frustration and fatigue, you will find energy and renewal? Will the fatigue go away if you see the frustration as a sign to stop? Yes, but eventually with the subsiding of fatigue will come the onslaught of regret. There are two pains: discipline and regret. And if you give in to the pain of discipline, you will experience the more severe pain of regret.

Job said, "The bow was renewed in my hands." In other words, he experienced renewal as he was going; in the middle of the pursuit, keep working the cut. I have had hockey players tell me they could not go out for the next shift and then someone scored and they were jumping onto the ice. I said, "I thought you were tired." They replied, "I thought I was." I have heard boxers say they could not go out for another round, and then they did, landed one punch and started boxing like a wild man. I said later, "I thought you were tired." They said, "I thought I was, too."

Do you feel tired building your dream, parenting a child, overcoming an illness? I got the answer: survive all assaults and work the cut. Do not let your emotions convince you life will be better if you stop. Emotions lie. Winning requires discipline that you can fight weary and expect energy to show up, the Calvary is on the way. Or said differently, if you keep on doing what you do, without judgment and without anticipating as you go and if you have a philosophy that physical and mental fatigue is a sign that you are getting close, not a sign that you are not making progress, then you will mount up with wings as eagles; you shall run and not be weary; you shall walk and not faint.

When I am weak, then I am strong

2012-01-25T18:59:00.000-08:00

Y'all, I am struggling today. I feel like I am straight up being attacked. I don't know much about spiritual warfare but I can't help but think that is what is going on.

Ephesians 12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

According to the above verse spiritual warfare is real. Not only is it real but it's alive and well. But, I'm clinging to God's promises. I'm looking back on all the prayers that have been answered and answered recently. Not all prayers are answered in the way I want but the Lord hears me. He hears my cries for help and I know He will not let me down. The enemy will not get the best of me. Fear and doubt do not belong in my heart.

In the midst of my coming apart this verse came to mind, 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

When I am weak Jesus gives me the strength I need to be strong. Strength, comfort and peace that can only come from Him. I am thankful and hopeful. Never give up.

Chocolate!!!

2012-01-24T19:07:00.000-08:00

My name is Sheila and I'm a food addict. I honestly can't get past thinking about donuts and chocolate long enough to sound half way intelligent. Your IQ is probably going down right now....

I did have to write down things I ate growing up for a study I'm doing. Boy that took me back. Being raised with 4 siblings by a single Dad it could have been worse. We ate a lot of Hamburger Helper, taco salad, roast and spaghetti. Every once in a while I will get taste for Hamburger Helper and a little Debbie cake. Not together though. It's funny though that little Debbie cakes aren't as good as I remember them being back in the day. My favorite was a Fudge Round!

Well this isn't helping my food addiction so Im going to bed. Hopefully tomorrow will bring something useful or at the least, funny :)

I love you, I just don't like you right now.

2012-01-23T19:38:00.000-08:00

I am happy to report that I have a better attitude today:) I apologized to my sweet family and they accepted the apology. Poor Denson knows when to steer clear and just let me be. Bless him! Our families usually get the brunt of our ugliness. Times like that I understand how it's possible to not like someone but still love them.

I've been doing a study on David for about a month and over the weekend started one on James. James is way more intense and will need more time. I should probably take a break from David but I'm so into his story that I don't want to. What to do, what to do!

Either way I'll continue to write what I learn. Tonight I'm learning that I have A LOT to learn. We have to step out of our comfort zones when God is calling us to do something regardless of how awkward it is. It's always worth it!

If you can't say something nice.....

2012-01-22T23:41:00.000-08:00

I have been in a super foul mood today. My family is probably ready to trade me in.

After reading negative posts on Facebook last week I decided I don't want to be one of "those" people so.......i will stick to the saying "If you can't say something nice don't say anything at all".

See you tomorrow with a better attitude!

Almost speechless

2012-01-21T18:24:00.000-08:00

The writers block is gone for tonight and I may end up boring you to death. This morning me and a wonderful group of ladies started Beth Moore's study on James: Mercy Triumphs. It was AMAZING!

I have so much to say that I may not make sense. I will give it my best shot but will say if you ever the opportunity to do this study, for the love, do it. You won't regret it I promise.

We start off by being introduced to James, Jesus' half brother and probably the first born natural child of Mary and Joseph. We learn that James and his siblings kinda poked fun at Jesus and didn't believe him to be the Messiah. But, James doesn't remain an unbeliever.

We go back to when Jesus was resurrected. The first point was this:

1. Jesus appeared to those who needed to see Him most.

Can anyone relate to that? I know I can. Jesus revealed himself to me when I needed it most. A lot of stubborn folks (like me) have to hit rock bottom before they start looking for Him. And He will not disappoint.

He also showed himself to Mary Magdalene. He had cleansed her of 7 demons previously. She was the only one at the tomb when Jesus arose. She was very upset. Beth made the point that maybe she wanted to be the last place she saw Him. Maybe she was thinking about what He saved her from and thinking her identity was based on that. He knew she needed to see Him. The other person was Paul and at the time he was persecuting Christians. He needed to see Jesus to have a life transformation. And lastly he appeared to James.

Not much is said. Just that He appeared to him. Beth adds that the details aren't given because it's probably none of our business. It was a personal conversation much like when we encounter Him. It is about a personal Savior not a public figure.

She went into great discussion on family which really hit home for me. There is no way I can articulate that part of the study. Very powerful stuff. I will leave you with this, the last point:

The power of the resurrection means that nothing but the tomb is meant to be empty.

Looking forward to the next 7 weeks as hard as they may be.

Revenge and a RD short story.

2012-01-20T18:45:00.000-08:00

Boy, David had a great chance at revenge with Saul. David was hiding in a cave and Saul decided to relieve himself unknowingly right where David was. He could have killed him at that time and didn't. But he did cut the end of his robe. After Saul walks away, David calls out to him basically saying - why are you trying to kill me, I don't understand, I could have just killed you, look I have a piece of your robe.

Im sure that scared Saul. If anyone deserved to die it was him. David's men were probably shocked that he spared him. There were several great points that i will share below.

David's standard for measuring sin was not the wickedness of Saul, but the holiness of God.

As we draw nearer to God, our sensitivity to conviction and our discernment of wrongdoing will increase. If we are filled by His Spirit, conviction will be met with a change in behavior.

A moment's revenge is not worth the cost of alienation from God,not even the revenge we've been waiting for and feel so justified to seize!

Now moving on to a quick Reese story. Today he talked about building a dirt bike track. As usual he went into great detail. He ended with saying everyone will be number 5 so everyone would win. That boy can be sweet at times. I have no clue who he gets his personality from but I sure do love it!

2012-01-19T19:15:00.000-08:00

I'm having another night of not knowing what to write. Reese can't save me tonight because he is already in bed. Thank goodness, he has been WILD tonight. I am so tired but I cannot go to bed until I can sit by myself and watch tv for a minute. Time.alone.I.need.it!

I really need the sleep though, i haven't slept well in almost a week. My mind just won't stop. I hate it when that happens. And apparently my mind has now stopped because I'm rambling about nothing.

I will just go ahead and stop now but I do have a praise. We had a huge answer to prayer this week. I know when the Lord is at work (and He is) the enemy is also at work. I need to see that and know my battle isn't against flesh and blood.

Writers Block

2012-01-18T19:03:00.000-08:00

Let me tell what just happened to me! I was literally just sitting here wondering what I was going to write and thinking about how much I just wanted to go to bed...when little Reese comes up to me with a kids Bible and says "is this really possible?". He handed me the book and it was turned to no other than David and Goliath.

In case you've not read the last few weeks, my daily study has been on David, which brings the well known story of his fight with a giant.

So, I tell Reese that of course that is possible and he proceeds to tell me the story in great detail. Can you say proud momma? That made my night and then he comes at me with this:

"Momma, I went in my room and I saw the Jesus Book and knew I just needed to study. That is the right thing to do. Its not good when you make bad decisions. God doesn't like it when you get spankings.". He sat at the table with his Jesus book and his "journal" and drew pictures of David and Goliath. He said no one could touch his books because they were very important.

Sometimes the best lessons come out of the mouth of babes.

I just don't understand

2012-01-17T19:11:00.000-08:00

I have almost gotten to where I can't watch the news on a daily basis. There are some really bad people in this world that do horrible things to others. How can someone be so evil?

It seems that things are getting worse but then I read about Saul being so jealous of David that he wants to kill him. When he finds out that certain men helped and prayed for David he had them bring their families to him. He questioned their actions and had them ALL killed. That is awful! It also said that Saul "grew strong" by destroying others. Again, just awful.

But we probably know at least one person that loves to stir up trouble at the expense of others. I have learned that people like that or people that pick on people not capable of taking up for themselves are super insecure. They feel better about themselves by bringing others down.

But, sometimes bad situations and tragedies bring us closer to God or bring us to Him period. That is for sure how I came to know Him. We live in a fallen world but He is our hope. God will repay evil. I can't imagine the warfare that goes on in the spiritual realm but I trust that all things work for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.

Loss for words

2012-01-16T19:17:00.000-08:00

Do you ever find yourself really wanting and needing to cry out to God but you can't find the words to pray? A couple of years ago I had a dream that was so sad that I woke up crying. Well sobbing might be a better word. I dreamed a family member had died and it seemed so real! It was early in the morning so no one was up so I went downstairs to pray. Except that I had no words. I mean, I kinda knew what I wanted to say but felt like my words were inadequate. I know God knew my heart and heard me crying out, I know that without a doubt.

My study today reminded me that there isn't a certain way to pray, or big Christian words that you have to use. I know I've complained to God, been angry with Him and I need to be able to just talk to Him. Be real. Be myself.

David's prayer in Psalm 142: 1-7
With my voice I cry out to the Lord;

with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord.

I pour out my complaint before him;

I tell my trouble before him.

When my spirit faints within me,

you know my way!

In the path where I walk

they have hidden a trap for me.

Look to the right and see:

there is none who takes notice of me;

no refuge remains to me;

no one cares for my soul.

I cry to you, O Lord;

I say, "You are my refuge,

my portion in the land of the living."

Attend to my cry,

for I am brought very low!

Deliver me from my persecutors,

for they are too strong for me!

Bring me out of prison,

that I may give thanks to your name!

The righteous will surround me,

for you will deal bountifully with me. (Psalm 142:1-7 ESV)

I can almost feel the desperation. I know I reference a lot of songs on here but these lyrics came to mind: I'm finding myself at a loss for words and the funny thing is, it's ok. The last thing I need is to be heard but to hear what you would say.

Sometimes just sitting in silence can do wonders for the soul. So, whether you need to let it all out or you are at a loss for words....it's ok.

Wonderful day at NVC

2012-01-15T17:22:00.000-08:00

Denson and I had a great conversation yesterday. He went hunting Friday and had lots of time to pray and think. The funny thing is....both of us came away from our time with God feeling the exact same about our situation. We have been struggling in this economy and if I think about it, the fact that we are "struggling" means we are still in business. We have been blessed over and over. We are both Ok with however things turn out. Not that God needs us to be ok, besides he knows how this story will end.

As God is working in us the enemy Is working also. As we go into church, anxiety and worry start to creep back in. No, I will not listen to the lies I tell my myself. We are in the house of the Lord! Everything about the service spoke to me. The music and the sermon.

I absolutely love the song, "Lead Me to the Cross". The lyrics:
Lead me the cross where your love poured out
Bring me to my knees Lord I lay me down
Rid me of myself I belong to you
Oh lead me, lead me to the cross.[Chorus (x2)]

Another song, God is Able:
Lifted up
He defeated the grave
Raised to life
Our God is able
In His name
We overcome
For the Lord
Our God is able

Then we go to the sermon. One of the points was: Be aware! A lie can sound like the truth. In Luke, when Jesus was in the wilderness,Satan tempted him. He even spoke scripture to him. The enemy knows the bible better than we do.

Second point was: Be real! Faith must be committed to practice.
You know, I hear a lot of people say they don't want to become a Christ follower because there are too many rules to follow. I used to think
that myself. I didn't want to give up my sin. I knew some of the things i did were wrong but it didn't matter. However, when I let Christ in it
wasn't about rules. It was about Jesus. It was about Him making me new. He took the desire away for the old habits. Your life changes
and you WANT to be better.

When you feel close to God and things seem to be going right, watch out and stand firm in your faith.

I have a new line for the kids

2012-01-14T18:28:00.000-08:00

I don't have any big revelations from today's study but I did come away from with a laugh and something new to say to the kids. On David's plight to get away from Saul he went to Achish king of Gath. Achish recognized him and David was afraid he had been found out. To save himself he started acting like a madman, making marks on the doors of the gate and letting saliva run down his beard. That is hilarious to me!!

What is more funny is that Achish asked his servants "Am I so short of madmen that you have to bring this fellow here to carry on like this in front of me?".

Oh my, I feel like I live with someone that acts just like this, except for maybe the saliva dripping down his face. I even have several walls in my house that have been marked on. So, the next Reese acts like an animal and Bailey comes to tell on him, I will totally use this line. Can't wait to see their faces!

God Reminders

2012-01-13T19:18:00.000-08:00

I feel like I've been reminded a lot lately of God's promises. I remember when I was first saved. I read the bible and prayed like crazy. I felt like God was with me all the time. Then I got complacent and life continued to get more hectic. I felt so far away from Him. I was very discouraged and just lonely. The reminders of the pit of depression he pulled me from, the people he placed in my life, the timing of so many things.....all reminders that he has never left me.

This morning I listened to a sermon by Charles Stanley about faith. Some of the scriptures were familiar stories that I needed to hear. The centurion and his servant and the women who had bleeding issues. Yes, that is some faith!

Love, love, love when I spend the morning in quiet and come away refreshed. After hearing the sermon, my morning study was on the same thing. It talked about David being on the run. He went to Nob and specifically to the priest Ahimelech. He asked for 5 loaves of bread. There was no bread to be found except for the bread of the Presence. Leviticus 24:5-9 says "This bread is to be set out before the lord regularly, Sabbath after Sabbath, on behalf of the Israelites, as a lasting covenant.".

I wonder if this reminded David of God's covenant with Him? Or did he remember all the things the Lord had saved him from at that moment maybe giving him strength to continue? The last possible reminder was this. He asked for a weapon since he left with nothing. The only weapon around was a sword that had belonged to GOLIATH! The giant he killed with a sling shot.

I can almost hear him say "Ok,Lord I hear you, we got this.". Keep your focus where with your faith is.

Glad Saul was not my dad.

2012-01-12T19:13:00.000-08:00

So it looks like dysfunctional families have always existed. And God did and continues to use jacked up people. Thank goodness!

Today I came to the part of the story where David has fled, afraid for his life. His best friend Jonathan comes to him and David is all, "What did I do to deserve to be killed?". Jonathan is in shock. He proceeds to tell him how his dad doesn't and wouldn't do anything without telling him.

This puts both of them in a really awkward position. David having to tell his best friend his dad is trying to kill him AND he apparently is not who you thought he was. Then Jonathan wanting to protect his best friend from his own father. One of them was in the wrong and he would have to choose a side.

They were true best friends. Even though they had a heated exchange it didn't change their friendship. That is what true friends do. I am going to list 3 evidences of a true friendship ( this probably goes without saying.....brought to you by Beth Moore).

1. Friends can speak their minds without fear.
2. Friends can share their hearts without shame.
3. Friends can stay close even at a distance.

If you are like me you are nodding your head yes right now. I may have already said this before but those true friendships are priceless!

I'm tired!

2012-01-11T19:33:00.000-08:00

The title has nothing to do with this post, just that I am, tired.

So Saul was really jealous of David. Jealousy can send you in a downward spiral of anger and bitterness real quick. Saul was angry and decided to have David killed. Luckily his wife was aware of this plan and told him he needed to leave. And he did.

One of the sad parts of the story is that David's wife was Saul's daughter. Saul thought that his daughter would be a snare to David. But he was wrong because she loved David. Could you imagine your Dad arranging for you to marry a guy hoping that you will not be a good wife and end up having him killed?? Terrible.

But you know love can conquer a lot. Love can change a person. When you accept the love of Christ, you become a new person. You want to love others too. And, God loved the world so much that He gave His only son to save us. That is powerful!

Jealousy

2012-01-10T18:56:00.000-08:00

Jealousy is usually not looked upon in a good light. Especially when it comes to Saul. He was very jealous of David. And really when you think about it, it was probably hard not to be. Everything David did, he was really good at. The people sang his praises and don't you know that got to Saul? I mean, we all probably know a "David". And we've been jealous at some point. Not good.

Now the next kind of jealousy really confuses me. God being jealous for us. Beth Moore says this - He is jealous on our behalf, jealous for us to know Him, to be kept from evil, to be ready for our Bridegroom. I also googled it and most everyone said God is jealous when we put anything before him. I'm not sure that both mean the same thing? I also think of the song "How He Loves" and the first line says "He is jealous for me. Loves like a hurricane, bending beneath the weight of his love and mercy.".

So, I need to figure that out.

Switching gears. Bailey is such a strong girl. She is not emotional at all. Very unlike me, but I really admire that quality. She loves to read and she started a new book today. I can't recall now what the book was about but it took place in a time where racism was prevalent. She told me about how one of the characters was racist and it made her want to cry. I am so glad she has compassion and knows how wrong racism is. Anything that makes her want to cry - I know it has touched her heart. Love my Bailey!

Reese on the other hand is emotional just like me! Bless him! The last few days he has been into words that rhyme and words that start with the same letter. Today he says "Hey Momma, private part and proactive start with the same letters!". He was so proud of himself. Can't wait to find out who else he shares that nugget of information with!

National Championship

2012-01-09T20:58:00.000-08:00

I almost missed posting today. I have some great news.......Alabama won the BCS National Championship! Not only did we win but we shut LSU out AND they only made it past the 50 yd line once. Great, great game! Roll Tide!!!!!

I've got nothing for a title today, sorry.

2012-01-08T19:07:00.000-08:00

Church was great today as usual. The sermon reminded me of the time in my life that I realized I NEEDED a Savior. Best decision I ever made. It also reminded me of the state of misery I once lived in. I never want to go back to the life I used to live. Ever.

Pastor Chris also talked about how the church isn't about one man, the deacons or a committee. The church is about Jesus Christ. It isn't about the pastor or the entertainment value. We shouldn't say, oh I had a good time at church, we should be more concerned about hearing from God and what He is teaching us.

After hearing a great message we get home and I really think this was the hardest parenting day ever! I don't know what happened or what Reese ate but he was in RARE form. He was really whiny and angry. He pitched a fit for an hour over not being able to play a video game. I tried talking to him calmly and nothing worked. Denson took over and finally calmed him down.

You want to know what my bible study was about today? Anger. Yep, anger. God is just good like that. Maybe God was showing me how I act sometimes, like a 4 yr old. I have gotten really good at justifying my anger.

Lord, I hear you. Thank you for loving me. Even the ugly.

Saturday!

2012-01-07T18:33:00.000-08:00

I wish I had lots of good stories of all the fun we've had today but as the old folks say, I'm down in my back. I also wished that came with a good story like how I went to the gym and worked so hard I pulled a muscle. Unfortunately I apparently sneezed the wrong way and pulled something. But after some rest I know it will be better soon. I hope.

Luckily the day was somewhat relaxing. Denson took Reese hunting for the first time. Something tells me that hunting may not be Reese's thing. The fact that he cries whenever a hunting show is on is not a good sign. Before leaving he told me that if he found a baby deer that wasn't rambunctious he would bring it home for a pet. Shockingly they didn't see any wildlife and was only in the deer stand for about 30 minutes.

Bailey and I laid around for most of the day which was great considering she just had a concussion and a cold. We did manage to take a trip to Walmart and I was reminded why I don't go to the one in Leeds anymore. A video for the song " We are the people of Walmart" could have been filmed there, no question. There are no words to describe what we saw.

My Beth Moore study today was about Jonathan and David's almost instant friendship. I love it when God puts people in our lives that are forever friends. I am grateful for my friend Kona B that I don't get to see nearly enough.

Looking forward to tomorrow and feeling better.

Wonderful reminder and a Reese funny

2012-01-06T17:43:00.000-08:00

I'm having a hard time deciding which one to start with....... I'll start with Reese. He absolutely loves Billy the Exterminator, Swamp People, Swamp Loggers etc. He never forgets anything so I don't know why the conversation we had this morning surprised me. It went like this: Reese: Momma, what is this green stuff? Me: What green stuff? Reese: I think it's snake peces. Me: What???? Reese: You know snake poop. Never short a laugh around here.

Today I got into the meat of the David and Goliath story. When Saul sent for David and was convinced that this boy was the man for the job he gave him his armor to wear to battle. But it was too big for him and he took it off. One of the questions in my study was: what pieces of armor do you still find yourself reaching for, not quite sure that God's Word and His promises are enough to depend on? At times I still try to figure things out and not rely on God. Second question was: What makes these extras and add ons so heavy after awhile? When I carry burdens not meant for me to carry, it gets heavy real fast.

Here are the points that really spoke to me. These are from Beth Moore's study on David:
We should measure the size of our obstacles against the size of our God.

We tend to measure our obstacles against our own strength. We often feel overwhelmed and defeated before the battle begins.

We need to acknowledge an active and living God in our lives.

We're often intimidated in battle because we are uncertain of our faith. But we must remember we dont stand in victory because of our faith. We stand in victory because of our God. Faith in faith is pointless, but faith in a living, active God moves mountains.

And here we go.....

2012-01-05T19:07:00.000-08:00

Days like today are the reason I made a commitment to blog daily. I am realizing that I have to be intentional with spending time with God. I can no longer say "I'm tired, I'll read extra tomorrow." or "I've had a long day, I deserve to watch a little tv.". I have been tempted to do that today.

All 4 of us are battling chest colds and I'm trying to keep us medicated so we don't end up going to the doctor. However, after 2 bottles of cough syrup and another 40 bucks spent at CVS, I'm thinking we may be better off just to go. Oh, and then Bailey probably has a concussion. She fell and hit the back of her head. After consulting with nurse Misty and the pediatrician i knew what to look for and will be waking her every four hours for two nights. And this is when I stop before I go on a rant that could last for hours....

Today's study was on the beginning of the story about David and Goliath. Now that is a story known by many. But I learned something new. I learned that David's brother Eliab was not very nice to him. But that did not stop David. Your family can either really encourage you or do the opposite

David remained undaunted by Eliab's criticisms for one reason: David took God's Word over the opinion of others. - Beth Moore

Aim to please God and not man.

Day 3

2012-01-04T16:32:00.000-08:00

Today we back tracked to 1Samuel 14:1-14. Jonathan, Saul's son, decided to go over to the Philistine side. Keep in mind the Phillistines are the enemy. Only Jonathan and the man bearing his armor went and no one knew they were going. Everyone else was literally hiding.

Verse 6 says- Jonathan said to his young armor bearer " Come, let's go over to the outpost of those circumcised fellows. Perhaps the Lord will act on our behalf. Nothing can hinder the Lord from saving, whether by many or by few".

It turns out the Lord did save them. I liked how Jonathan knew the Lord could save them, that He could do anything. He just wasn't sure that God would choose to do so. Either way he knew God was sovereign and if he didn't help them it wasn't because he couldn't.

I think it's important for us to be able to accept God's will before we even know what it is. Sometimes his will is the complete opposite of what we want but he is sovereign. We have no idea what he could really be saving us from or how a negative circumstance could be used to make us more like Christ.

I will leave you with this- Romans 8:28-30 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For this God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to his likeness of his son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

Day 2

2012-01-03T17:42:00.000-08:00

I'm started to figure out I can learn a lot from Saul, or maybe how not to do things. So far though I've realized there are more similarities than I care to admit. Todays lesson was from 1Samuel 15:12-29. God told Saul to destroy the Amalekites. Everything including the livestock. But he chose to keep the best livestock to sacrifice to God. To me it's like your child stealing something from a store but telling you they really thought you would like the gift despite breaking the law and stealing.

Samuel already knew what Saul had done. He confronted him but Saul tried to justify his actions. He Said he obeyed God and kept what he did for the Lord. This is another example of being self centered. That is just like something I would do. God, I know you said to do this but I thought it would work better for me to do something else instead.

So Saul was rejected as King for being disobedient. All he had to do was exactly what God said and he didn't. Again he tried to blame the people saying he was afraid of them and gave in to what they wanted. Compromising will not get you where you want to be. Anytime you choose to please people instead of God it will not have a happy ending.

Ive learned that lesson the hard way one too many times. I am extremely grateful for God's grace when I think about how He has never given up on me. He loves us even in our sin but loves us even more to not let us remain comfortable in it. Thank you Lord!

2012

2012-01-02T07:39:00.000-08:00

I am making a commitment for 2012 to blog every.single.day. That is going to be tough since the last post was nearly nine months ago! I want to share things God is teaching and showing me daily. I feel like blogging will hold me accountable to be more consistent in my time with the Lord. 2011 was not a good year of me putting God first on a daily basis.

I have just completed day 13 of a new bible study and I have already learned some new things. Things that have not felt so good to learn about myself. Day 11 was titled, "self centeredness in disguise". It talked about Samuel finding a new leader, Saul. Saul was like, what do you want with me, I'm from the smallest clan in Israel? Then when Samuel summoned the people of Israel to introduce them to their King, Saul, he could not be found. The last part of 1Samuel 10:22 says "And the Lord said, "Yes, he has hidden himself among the baggage.". I think alot of times we don't allow ourselves to be used by God because we are hiding in our baggage. We think that God could never use us because of where we've come from, things we've done before we became a new person in Christ. Really, even things we've done after becoming new. See we/I like to hold on to the old sometimes. We hear that little voice saying I can't believe you call yourself a Christian, you need to just lay low before you are found out. But that is the enemy and only the enemy keeping you from being what you could be if you allow God to work in and through you.

So, what does that have to do with being self centered? He started off thinking he was not worthy because of the family he came from. He was either experiencing godly humility or low self esteem.

A person with godly humility looks to the master. He or she neither exalts nor denigrates self, because to do either is to make self the center of our universe. When we're really serving Christ, our reputations and abilities simply cease to be so important. - Beth Moore

In reading that I learned that I have been self centered a lot. It's not about me, it's about God and doing what He wants. I tend to worry about what others think too much. That is being self centered and I never knew it.

The other thing that stood out to me was the following lesson on people pleasers. Now I knew this would be something I needed to read because I have always been a people pleaser. When Saul finally came out of hiding and was presented most of the people were shouting for joy but a few people publicly insulted him. And you know what he did? NOTHING. He probably wanted everyone to like him. People pleasers have difficulty in standing up for what's right. They don't want to make people mad and again, worry about what others think. When we act that way we prioritize self over God.

I am excited and maybe a liitle scared of the rest of this study but I am committed! Here's to sharing my life and life lessons in 2012 :)

You can learn a lot from Johny

2011-04-12T16:38:00.000-07:00

I just love blogging! Well, reading blogs more so than writing them lately. We have been really, really busy. Bailey is playing softball and OH. MY. WORD. it is time consuming to say the least. I am secretly (not so secret now) hoping that she doesn't want to play next year. Not looking good for me as of now. Over the last few months I have learned a lot from my kids. And really, if you think about it, all of us adults could use some child like faith. Bailey came home talking about a boy in her class who hadn't been eating lunch. The school provides a lunch for anyone that doesn't have money but the boy didn't want anyone to know he didn't have money so he carried an empty lunch box to the lunch room. Bailey gave him part of her lunch and even gave him her ice cream. It warms my heart that at 9 yo she can see a need and want to help. She has taken extra money and snacks to school to give to other classmates. I pray that she will always be so caring. Reese, sweet Reese......he is such a people person! Everywhere we go and I mean everywhere we go people talk to Reese and he is such a talker. It is like talking to an adult at times. Over the last few months he says he is Johny Cash. He talks about him alot and how he sings in prison. He told Bailey one night, "Bailey if you're not good you're going to prison!" Of course I tell them both, "The people in prison...you know how it all started??? Talking back to their Mamas, that was at the beginning of their path to prison!" I probably shouldn't take it that far but gracious, I just don't know what else to do sometimes! He has also become obsessed with cigarettes. He saw my Nanny smoking and I guess that was the first time he really paid attention. He asked her a lot of questions like "Why are you smoking? If it's bad for you why do you do it?" He says he has smoke pencils. He told his Sunday school teacher that he used to smoke but he quit. I'm sure they think we are awesome parents! Recently Reese had a new little girl join his class at daycare. She was really shy and wouldn't play with anything or anyone. When Reese came in, he sat down next to her instead of playing. Before long they were playing together and she warmed right up. However, she knew him as Johny Cash and not Reese. Very sweet that he wanted her to feel comfortable. I would also like to say that he talks with people that don't scream "talk to me". Like older ladies covered in tattoos with 20 earrings. Although he started the conversation with "You have a lot of wrinkles". I wish I could just see people as people and not have preconceptions of who they are and where they've been. He and Denson were in the grocery store and a lady dropped what she was holding. Without any question, he walked over and helped her pick up her things. He then told her he would help her plant a garden. I can and am learning alot from that little boy. He likes to pray, pretends he is having a bible study and remembers everything when you have no idea he was even listening. I will leave you with this Reese funny: Reese: "Mama, come here (bathroom)". Me: "Ok, do you need me to wipe you?" Reese: "No, I have turds and I want you to see 'em". Awesome, I felt privileged. I guess :)

Jello Casserole

2011-01-10T17:06:00.001-08:00

We had a snow day today which was fun and interesting. As much as Reese loves being outside he does not like the cold. at all. All four of us rode the 4-wheeler around the neighborhood, which I'm sure, has pegged us as the rednecks of Creekside Cove. Bailey and I made a sled out of a large rubbermaid lid afterwards which may or may not have helped the redneck stereotype :)

So after being inside ALL day and following a weekend where Reese was sick, that boy had a LOT of energy! He tormented Bailey and was non stop the entire day.

Bailey and I decided to play Contract Rummy which is really a whole new story of its own......Anywho, Reese was being fairly good while we played (which was a relief) so I didn't pay much attention to what he was doing.

That may have been a mistake because when I did look to see what he was doing this is the first thing I saw. Empty Jello containers. This can not be good.

He had pulled out pots, pans, crock pots, tupperware, forks, spoons, and I think I even found a hair brush IN the stove.

And a potato peeler to stir the jello casserole as he called it.

He even mixed some Lucky Charms with the jello. And it is on the oven door. Kinda reminds me of the jello mold Aunt Bethany brought to Christmas dinner on Christmas Vacation.

So after he got bored with the jello, he accidentally dumped the rest of the Lucky Charms on the floor. ACCIDENTALLY mind you but a mess none the less!

This picture shows a glimpse of the mess. And this is all because I wanted to beat a 9 yr old at cards!

I guess making Jello casserole will wear you out because 30 minutes later this is how I found him. Looking at that precious face you would never think he could be so destructive! Oh, and I did win the card game so maybe it was worth it :)

Doubt and Fear PEACE!

2010-12-07T20:24:00.000-08:00

Wow, it has been a REALLY long time since I have written. I have been lacking motivation and just overwhelmed with life.

The last few months have been particularly trying. We are being affected by this lovely economy as are tons of people. Really, we have held on for 3 years now which is absolutely amazing. The way God has provided and that can only be contributed to Him. He has kept us going. Even with me knowing that, I allowed fear and doubt to creep in. God, where will we live? How long will it take us to get back on our feet? Will we sell everything? How will we explain having to move to the kids?

I have cried, literally cried out to God to guide our steps and tell our hearts if we need to go in another direction business wise. It's easy to say I trust God but when He is all I have, can I really trust and be ok?

You know, God doesn't owe me an explanation or have to tell me what His plans our for our future. I started to realize that God isn't concerned with us being comfortable. We have tried to sell our house to no avail. I thought maybe this will be God's way of getting rid of the "things" in our life. ......and I'm OK with that. I have come to terms that God is still God, still in control and regardless of what happens to our business WE WILL BE OK!! Our happiness is not based on where we live, or what we have. To be honest here, in the last year I've really felt guilty about what we do have when there are so many people that need help. What can we sell and then who can we help? I read the book "Radical" by David Platt which is A-Mazing! A gentlemen in the book said that he thought maybe he was crazy for giving so much money away and then he realized that when he died and stood before God he would not hear him say "You should have kept more for yourself". Wow! Really puts things in perspective.

So, over the last 2 months God has calmed my fears with a couple of different verses. During this time I had been seeing feathers in the kitchen, living room, Denson's office, playroom, and in my car. After awhile I started to wonder why and if that meant something. I tried to look up meaning or significance of feathers. I didn't find anything biblical so I just dismissed it. Well, I came across a picture that had Psalms 91:4 on it. THIS is what it says:
Psalms 91:4
He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

I could hardly contain the excitement! I needed to read that and probably would not have thought much about it had I not seen all of those feathers. God is just awesome like that!

The other verse I wrote down and have in my kitchen so I can see it multiple times a day. It is:
Psalms 62:5-6 I find rest in God; only he gives me hope. He is my rock and my salvation. He is my defender; I will not be defeated.

All the doubt and fear were taken away and I have peace. AND God is still providing our every need! Christmas time is such a magical time of year. To think about the Saviour of the world being born and all the miraculous things surrounding His life make me beyond grateful that He saved me!

I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas!

NEVER a dull moment

2010-09-16T18:09:00.001-07:00

Since I haven't written in a while, I thought I would share some Reese stories. Because I'm never short on a Reese story.

One evening he told us his name was no longer Reese but Jim. He was a painter, and drove a red truck. Anytime I said Reese he quickly corrected me. Not only did his name change but he referred to himself in third person. He yelled from the potty, "Momma, come wipe Jim". I asked him "Reese, are you tired?" "Yeah, Jim is tired".

The next morning we thought for sure he had forgotten about it but no, he was still Jim. We get to daycare and everyone that said "Hey Reese!" he told them he was Jim. Later in the day and little girl hit him and this is what he said to the teacher "Mary (name changed to protect the not so innocent) hit Jim". The last funny bit was when one of his friends said "Bye Reese" and "Jim" looked at the mom and said "He doesn't know my name is Jim now". After about a day and a half he went back to Reese :)

This next story still has me baffled. Monday morning Denson walks into to the living room to see Reese going potty in between the cushions on the couch!! Bailey chimes in that the couch was wet the night before and thought someone had just spilled something. We asked Reese about it and it was pee pee!! We were livid and grossed out. That afternoon we steamed cleaned the couch and decided we better find out if there were any more "marking of the territory". The answer was yes, and the following were steam cleaned, or washed: behind his bed, side of his bed, IN THE TOY BOX, and the dining room rug!

We told him that if we caught him doing this again we would throw his big boy underwear away and he would have to wear diapers from now on. He didn't like that at all so HOPEFULLY I won't have another story like it.

Stay tuned for the next Reese story in the making I'm sure!

I'm Not Who I Was

2010-08-06T17:14:00.000-07:00

I just love this song! I can relate because sometimes I wish I could tell people from my past how much I've changed. Some of the mistakes I've made, people I've hurt and even people I learned things from......I wish they could see me now. I would love to explain why, and how I changed.

I am so thankful God did not give up on me and I am so thankful He made me a new person. There is no other explanation!

Hair by Reese

2010-07-08T06:52:00.000-07:00

My sweet little baby boy could easily be called "Dennis the Menace". I can't even begin to tell you all things this boy gets into on a DAILY basis. He has a great imagination. I really need to start taking pictures of the things he makes. As I'm writing this, he has lined up the chairs in the kitchen. He says it is a train. His tiger is riding the train and he has him "buckled up" with the power cord for my swiffer vacuum. And the witch won't leave him alone so he is driving the train to get away from her. Alrighty then.

The whole reason for this post is about 2 months old and yes, my name is Sheila and I am a procrastinator.

One Saturday morning, I was cooking pancakes and Reese walks into the kitchen with a pair of scissors........on his head. He was quite proud of himself and told me he had cut his hair. He led me to the spot where all I saw was a pile of blond hair. Again, he was very proud of himself while I began tearing up. Yes, I know it's just hair and it will grow back but he cut it so short the only way to fix it is to shave the rest of his hair almost completely off!

No lie, the boy had only been up for 30 minutes. Maybe he dreamed of being a barber, I don't know but that is what he decided to do when he woke up. I got over being upset and he still looks just as cute with his little shaved head :)

"Are you wearing a back brace?"

2010-05-28T16:08:00.000-07:00

Lately I have had to come to terms that I am getting older. I can't believe Bailey will be going into the 4th grade this fall. I can remember being in 4th grade myself so am I old enough to have my very own 4th grader?!?! After the last week I can sadly say yes :(

Starting off, I have become an embarrassment to my daughter. Twice, yes twice, I have asked who I thought was an employee of the store a question to find out that they were not an employee of that store. First time it happened I justified it but the second time I asked a man in Fred's wearing a Target shirt for assistance. I may just be losing it........and Bailey was mortified!

Bailey and I were having a girl day and we saw a store we had never gone into called "Wet Seal". We thought we would take a peak. If any of you are familiar with this store I'm sure you are laughing right now. As soon, and I mean as soon as we hit the door I realized that everyone in the store was in shock that we had walked in. I have never seen such short shorts, skirts or tiny, tiny bikinis EVER! We played it cool, well Bailey did and we looked around. Bailey actually found a cute shirt and believe it or not I did too........ a vest with a belt attached. I thought it was pretty cute and maybe, just maybe I was cool enough to wear it.

I decided I would wear the vest to work and I didn't think it was too bad and Bailey actually liked it. Denson did make a few jokes about me looking like a "black belt" karate person, but hey, what does he know about fashion?

However, the moment I knew this vest was a mistake was when someone I know said, "Hey, are you wearing a back brace?" I immediately started laughing and said no. At that point I knew I would never wear the vest again. I have posted a picture below so you can see that it really is cute...............................I'm just not cool enough to rock a vest with a belt :)

F.R.E.E.D.O.M

2010-05-16T18:31:00.000-07:00

I have had the best weekend! A group of girls and I went to the EWomen's Conference and it was PHENOMENAL!!!! All of the speakers were great as well as the music. I would encourage anyone that is thinking about going to this conference to go (Like there are thousands of people that will actually be reading this).

The theme of the conference was "Embracing Powerful Peace". I don't know about you but I could use some peace these days. I thought I would share with you a few things I learned. Sheri Rose Shepherd spoke and gave an acronym for FREEDOM......

F - Fight the good fight. We are in a constant spiritual battle. Keep the faith!
R - Run to God!
E - Enter into praise & prayer.
E - Eliminate the things that exhaust you, stress you out, etc.
D - Do what God wants you to do.
O - Operate in your appointed position.
M - Move On! Isaiah 43:18 "Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past."

Think of the freedom we will experience if we put these things into practice! At times it is hard to know what God wants us to do. However, if we stay in the word, pray, and keep those things away from our life that don't bear fruit we will be able to know when God is speaking. We also, need to understand that we may not always get the answer or response we are wanting. Deuteronomy 20:5 - "You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God........" The idols of our day are different from the idols the Israelites looked to. Anything that keeps us away from God and His purpose for our lives is an idol. If God tells us "no" to something we have been in prayer for, then it could just be that we are looking to "that" to make us happy, and we are to turn to God for that happiness.

The above verse is obviously something God is speaking to me about. I have heard and read this verse numerous times over the past couple of days. That my friend, is one of the ways God "speaks" to me, through scripture!

Lastly, I will leave you with scriptures from the weekend that in my opinion, are powerful and will help get you through those rough times we are either facing, faced, or will be facing.

1 Thessolonians 5:16-17 Be joyful always, pray continually.

James 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perserverance. Perserverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Psalms 73:26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Lamentations 3:23-24 - They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "the LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."

Swimsuit Season :(

2010-04-25T13:31:00.000-07:00

I thought this post from last year was worth posting again. I've not even thought about a swimsuit this year and after reading this again I may just wait until a miracle happens and I lose 20 lbs!!

Really, after reading the title I probably don't have to say more.....but I will.

We are going to the beach for the weekend with one of my sisters, my two brothers, dad and stepmom and the "many small children" (I ~~stole~~ took that quote from Mckmama's blog, love it!) that belong to them. I'm sure we will have a blast and have many stories to share when we return.

I started packing today and thought I should try on my swimsuits to see if they were a go. I have been going to the gym for a little over 2 months now, so I expected the swimsuits from the last 2 yrs to ~~fall off~~ be a little big on me. Boy did I get a suprise.....the same!! The exact same, how does that happen!! Well, except that they were a little stretched out, so it wasn't sucking in enough for my taste. Can you say disappointed?

The one thing I dread more than finding a good fitting pair of jeans....finding a swimsuit that doesn't make me look like I'm a 32 yr old trying to be 15. Let's just be honest here, most swimsuits these days are not made for a person that has 2 children......unless you are a celebrity and can work out all day and have a personal chef to make a fabulous meal with like 10 calories...whatever.

So, I mustered up the courage to go shopping with my 2 kids in tow. Probably not a wise choice, but I was running out of time and Bailey is pretty good at giving fashion tips. (You know you need help when you look to a 7 yr old for fashion advice!)

We go to Kohls, and I was very pleased with their selection. A good bit of their swimsuits had the good ole skirt attached. Yes!!!!!

I pick out 3 and off to the dressing room we go.

I'll just say that the look on Bailey's face said it all. Ummm, that's a no on choice number 1!!! On to choice number 2........another bad look. We are in a public place so I'm not sure that I really want her opinion to be said out loud. Finally I had to ask, what is it you don't like. Another bad look.........then she says "I mean it's your legs that's all." That's all???? Do they make swimsuit pants? If so, please let me know.

I go onto choice 3 and she actually liked it!!! A flippin miracle, woohoo!!

Oh, while we are in the dressing room, Reese decided to scream, "Mommy poo pooed!". Nice, not like I was already humilated with a 7yr old that doesn't have an ounce of fat on her looking at me in total disgust, I have Reese yelling that I had pooped. Great, just great!

We check out and get in the car. I had to ask about the leg comment. I told her it was ok to be honest, but just tell me what was so bad about my legs. She says, "They are just too white." I can totally deal with that. I know fat looks better tan, but I have sworn off tanning beds. I will have to get a tan the good old fashioned way...........getting sun burned at the beach!!

Nothing like a good ol' boost to the self esteem than shopping for a swimsuit with a very honest 7 yr old!

I'm finding myself at a loss for words.

2010-03-15T19:08:00.000-07:00

I had a moment today.................while folding clothes. One of my least favorite things to do and there He was, right there with me! I am trying very hard not to watch a lot of TV so I decided to listen to music and "Word of God Speak" by Kutless came on and the tears were flowing before I knew it.
Chorus:
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That Your in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your Holiness
Word of God speak

God is everywhere and in everything. At times that is hard to see. As I've mentioned before, a good friend and I are doing a bible study on Esther. Esther is the only book in the bible that never mentions God.......but, He is all over it!

Psalm 139: 7-10 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand, will hold me fast.

I think I've mentioned this before, but I think it's worth saying again. Things we are able to get away with (not feel convicted about) now, may be the things that we can't get away with (feel convicted) months down the road. We are always being pruned, which will allow us to grow spiritually.

John 15:1-2 I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.

There are 3 areas I feel that are being pruned right now:

1. Time- The way I spend my time - mostly watching TV. Most shows I watch bring nothing of value to my life. The world likes to tell us "You've worked hard today, the kids are in bed, you deserve it, watch whatever you want." Trust me, I have a lot of work to do but I have cut out 3 shows so far and I don't even miss it!

2. Faithfulness - Remain faithful in giving ESPECIALLY during the hard times. I came across Hebrews 10:35-39 on 3-5-10 and I had marked in my bible on 3-5-06. Exactly 4 yrs later! Verse 35 - So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. God will provide and the bible doesn't say to give if you feel like it or if things are going well.

3. Stay Strong - Satan will always be working to bring you down. He knows what works and will use that against you time and time again. There are certain lies that get in my head from time to time and I refuse to let my thoughts go there anymore!!

God is there, even when we find ourselves at a loss for words, and the funny thing is, it's ok.

Same Post - Different Words :)

2010-02-09T13:34:00.000-08:00

So I've had several different topics on my mind to blog about lately. Obviously I've procrastinated quite a bit. As usual.....when I sit down to write, I draw a big fat blank so this post may or may not make sense :)

In the last few weeks, conversations I've had with my hubby have really stood out. I love that I can talk to him about things that are floating around in my head and for the most part he gets what I'm trying to say and adds to it. Now, he could just be being nice but either way I feel like getting those thoughts out verbally help to process things.

From our conversations and sermons Pastor Chris has preached I've come to the realization that being a christian, or telling someone you are a christian, really has the potential to cause a good bit of harm or (hopefully) alot of good. For some people, they may encounter very few christians in their life. What that person says, does, or doesn't do is what becomes their idea of what all christians are like. Sure, we are not perfect by any means. If an alocoholic sees a "christian" drinking, would that make that person think that it might be ok? If "the world" sees us and can't really see a difference in how they are living and how you are, then what would their incentive be to become a christian? I think God is more concerned about us being holy and leading others to him than how we want to live. I don't know about you, but doing things the way I've wanted them haven't worked out real well.

D.L. Moody wrote: " It is a great deal better to live a holy life than to talk about it. We are told to let our light shine, and if it does we won't need to tell anybody it does. The light will be it's own witness. Lighthouses don't ring bells and fire cannons to call attention to their shining - they just shine."

Wow, that is pretty powerful!

Moving on to a couple of other revelations. I looked back the other day on when I became saved. I had been in church on and off my whole life, knew what I needed to do but never did it. I can recall realizing I NEEDED a saviour. I truly could not do the thing we call "life" here another second on my own. Days later I also realized there was NOTHING I could do to earn my salvation. "Isn't that crazy?" I thought. So, I know that there is nothing I or anyone else can do to get a person to accept Christ. But, we can plant seeds and be an example and I guarantee you when someone comes to the place that they need a saviour they will think of you and what you've said. I know I thought of a man that I used to work with that was a good christian example. No matter what was going on at work, no matter where the office Christmas parties were, he always acted the same. He invited me to church several times, although I never accepted. But, when I finally GOT IT, I wanted to let him know that I did and I appreciated all the kind words he spoke and the example that he was.

So after having the above conversation with Denson, we started talking about all the things that had to happen for us to be in the place we are at now. First, I wasn't a believer and the fact that God was busy working things out even when I could care less is just amazing. Second, when my "light" was turned on, luckily I had a supportive spouse and we starting growing together. Since I had been married before and didn't have that luck when I did try to do "church" - I know that mine and Denson's marriage was meant to be. We sure didn't consult Him before getting married!

One last thing, a good friend and I have started the Beth Moore study on Esther. It is amazing!! I had heard of her before but never read any of her books. Well, this study has made me a Beth Moore fan. We will start week 2 tomorrow and I can't wait! Hope everyone has a great week!

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. Colossians 3:2

2010-01-13T20:10:00.000-08:00

Do you ever have dreams that you wish you could somehow record and go back and watch? I have and last night was one of them. I dreamed about my PaPa! It was weird but it was like I had gone back in time before he passed away and he was telling me things I needed to know to live a good life. It was like I knew he was gone but I wanted to soak up as much of what he was telling me as I could. Of course I can't remember everything but what did stick out in my mind was him telling me not to worry about the things of this world....there was nothing "here" that could make me happy. In the inside I was thinking, "Yes! I know that now and you would be so proud!" It was great to see his face and remember him. Gosh, he's been gone 14 yrs and I still miss him so much!

He was such a wise, Godly man. I wish I really could go back and ask him questions. I would ask him to tell me about his life before God and what led him to Him (my nanny has where he had written it down, we just need to find it!). I would get more details of his dream/vision of heaven. Just plain ol' advice for life.

I wish I could tell him what an impact he had on my life. Unfortunately I didn't realize it until he was gone. Really, him telling about his dream of heaven saved me. It took a long time but I never forgot it.

The things we say and do now......we never know how God will use that to impact lives years down the road.

One last thing. We had community group tonight and the 2nd scripture we read was Colossians 3:1-11. The first couple of verses said "Since then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." I don't think it was a coincidence that I had that dream and THEN this scripture was part of our study tonight. God is so awesome!

New Years Resolution

2010-01-01T17:04:00.000-08:00

I have felt really convicted here lately on what I watch on TV. I have been so quick to want to get the kids to bed on certain nights so I can watch one of my shows. At the same time, I'm putting off other important things, much more important things like spending time with God.

Do things you hear ever stick with you and you feel like you'll never forget them? I have a few and one that keeps popping in my mind is something I heard Joyce Meyer say some years ago. She was talking about growing spiritually and that things you were able to do last year, are the same things you won't be able to the next. I have found that to be so true! I remember the first time I drank alcohol after being saved...........I KNEW that was something I could not do anymore. I think back on things that I've done and just cringe at the thought. No way could I do those things at this point in my life. But, I am so thankful that I didn't have to have it all together in order to be able to attend church and worship God. He accepts us just as we are and as a matter of fact He is the one that gives us the strength to kick bad habits. He even takes desires away for the not so good things and gives us new desires.

One of my goals this year is to memorize one bible verse a week. I had a conversation with a family member about a week ago. She was very sad and told me of an experience she had and that after that, she quit praying that God would just let her die. So, hours after the conversation I wake up thinking of the verse that says:" The thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full." John 10:10. I so wish I could have given her that scripture. Life is tough and is just not fair at times but we are not supposed to live a defeated life. Of course I had to look up the scripture because I did not have it memorized. With that being said I remembered a verse that says something about hiding God's word in your heart......(after searching for 20 minutes) ok, couldn't find that but maybe this is what I was thinking Ephesians 6:10-18. This talks about putting on the full armor of God. How can I do that without knowing the scripture?

Sometimes it is hard to know what God is telling us or wants us to do but the more we stay in the word and pray He reveals himself. It is so awesome how confirmation from others that have no idea what's going on can be used by God and not even know it.

So, I guess you could say I have 2 New Year's resolutions: 1.Quit watching so much junk on TV(not everything is junk but alot is)! 2. Memorize scripture.

I know 2010 will be a great year, I just know it!

Divine appointments.

2009-12-08T19:52:00.000-08:00

Shortly after I became a Christian, I remember a friend of mine telling me that I would learn that there is no such thing as a coincidence. Oh my goodnes was he right! I look back now and see how if certain things hadn't happened I wouldn't be where I am today.

I think I've written before that I've been in situations and realized that I was supposed to be in that place at that time, no doubt. Those are the times that I KNOW just how much God is in control and just how real HE is. It's amazing how God is working in and around us and we don't always see it.

About 2 months before I found out I was pregnant with Reese, I went to the doctor for my yearly check-up. In the exam room while I was waiting, a magazine was sitting there. On the front of it was Reese Witherspoon and it said "Sweet Reese". We had already been talking about names and I just got chills....wondering if that was a sign of what was to come. The next day, Denson and I were looking at a house that was under construction. There were mirrors that were lableled with their kids names and what name was on one of them......yep, Reese! I knew that would be our baby's name.

I truly believe that the people we encounter, places we go, are no accident. Have you ever gotten the feeling you should say something to a person? I have and I don't act on it like I should. I guess in fear that the person will think I'm crazy, but I always feel horrible when I miss the opportunity. I will say I have not always gotten the response I've expected either. But, I am just the messenger and God is still at work!

I am so not good with words but I pray that God will give me the words to speak to people I encounter and the courage to not back down.

Be careful little feet where you go for it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow...

2009-11-14T19:15:00.000-08:00

Little ones are so funny.......they want to do everything they see others do, especially their parents. Reese mocks EVERYTHING Denson does. He pretends to build houses, talk on the phone, cut the grass. He also pretends to do things I do like cook, clean, and get on to Bailey. He repeats everything he hears and I do mean everything. THAT has been a not so good reminder when you hear your 2 yr old say butt hole! Oh, and he wants to do whatever Bailey is doing, like singing, dancing, and even homework. I'm sure he'll get out of the last one when he starts school.

This last week Reese has acted like he was the one that had back surgery. It really got me thinking that what we, as parents, do really, really affects how our kids grow up and perceive things. Practice what you preach is what we should do. How can we tell our kids not to do something when they see us doing it? It makes me sad to think of children that grow up not hearing about God, seeing there parents do not so nice things, think it is ok for a man to beat a woman, have zero respect for themselves or others and many other things.

Anyone can bring a life into this world but that doesn't make them a parent. What a precious gift God has given to so many that treat the gift worse than some treat a dog. I just don't understand.

So, I think this is a challenge to me and others to be that example that some may never see anywhere else. I know I need to be a better example to my kids too. Some of the things I hear Bailey and Reese say sound just like me! Sometimes it's funny and other times I think "Wow, I sound like that?"

I'll say this last thing. I think it is super important who our kids look up to and are around. They are paying attention even when we have no clue. For example, Reese picked up Bailey's bible a few nights ago and said he was Pastor Chris and he was reading the new old testament. He even prayed after the story! It was the sweetest thing he's ever done. I pray that he and Bailey always look up to people that live their life for God.

Once saved always saved?

2009-10-24T19:29:00.000-07:00

I often struggle with this question. I find it hard to understand how self professing Christians act, and do the same things that non-Christians do. I feel I am being judgemental, and I guess I am but......my heart is burdened for them. If one truly believes that what the bible says is true we should want to make sure others KNOW the truth.

I think for the most part, people as a whole, want to believe in God and that Jesus died on the cross to save the world from sin. BUT, the following verse shows that following Jesus is not easy. Matthew 7:13 "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." It's just human nature to go the easy route, but that leads to destruction.

I listened to a sermon last week by David Platt that I found very interesting. It really got me thinking about the above question. I think many are being deceived that all you have to do is say a prayer, ask for forgiveness, and walk down the aisle and that's it, you're done. That is just the beginning. You are born again at the point and the holy spirit dwells in you. Your eyes are opened. I will list some of the notes from the sermon. We can profess publicly what we do not possess personally. Is is possible that one could walk down the aisle and say the right things without REALLY having it? Walking down the aisle itself will not save you.

The way of Christ is always fruitful. James 2:26 "As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead." I firmly believe that others should see that you are different from "the world" you shouldn't have to tell them you are different, it should show.

The way of Christ is always faithful. Matthew 7:21 "Not everyone who says to me, Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in Heaven." Being obedient to God is key.

We all sin and fall short of the glory of God. One must repent. I looked up the definition and this is what it said: Repentance is not merely a change of mind but a radical change in one's life as a whole that especially involves forsaking sin and turning or returning to God. Make a RADICAL change.....we don't keep on doing the same thing. Luke 13:5 "I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish." That is pretty powerful once you come to a clear understanding of what repentance means.

I really feel like the gospel has been watered down as to not offend anyone. We can't twist and turn God's word to make it say what we want it to say. Sometimes the truth hurts. Once we realize that we have to give up the ways of the world in order to keep what we can't afford to lose (eternal life) it is all worth it.

God is just awesome!

2009-10-14T19:05:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying God is just awesome!!

Poor Denson has to have another back surgery. He will be having 2 fusions on November 2nd. He desperatly needs some relief and although the recovery time will be tough it will be worth it in the long run.

I know you are thinking "God is awesome....back surgery........ummm, I don't get it." So, that brings me to this..... As Denson was leaving the hospital after meeting with his doctor about the surgery, there was a little old lady with a walker that had parked her car pretty much on the ramp of the parking deck. At first Denson just kept on going and was on the phone with his Mom. He told her about the lady and she told him he needed to help her. So, Denson asks the lady if he could help park her car. She said yes of course but there weren't any parking spaces close by. She proceeds to tell him to pull his truck out of his space and then park her car there. The problem with that is a line had began to form and someone was bound to get that spot. Well, the little ond lady with her walker stood in the parking spot, shooing people away until Denson could back her car down the parking deck into his spot. She was very grateful and told him he would be a blessed man for helping her. She asked if there was anything she could pray for. He told her that he just learned that he would be having another back surgery and if she could pray for that he would appreciate it. She said he would be prayed for that night when she said her prayers.

The awesome thing is..... Denson was nervous about the surgery and rightfully so. But, God knew that and through this sweet little old lady gave him what he needed. He said he feels at peace about the surgery now. I just love it when things like that happen and there is no mistaking it was God.

*************************************************************************************
Lastly, I am just so heartbroken for a friend of mine. She has learned that she has breast cancer for the 2nd time. She beat it once and many prayers are going up for her to be healed again. After beating cancer the 1st time, she suffered the loss of her youngest son AND her Mom within the same week. She is just the sweetest person you can meet and it breaks my heart thinking of what she has had to endure. Please say a prayer for her, her name is Liz.

I know that prayer is very powerful because our prayers are heard by the maker of the universe. That is so hard to fathom sometimes......THE maker of the universe!

In the next few days I'll be posting the latest antics of none other than Reese. One story involves a pop tart and a potato peeler:) That boy has got to be the most creative (and destructive) 2 yr old I know!!

Hope everyone is having a good week!!

Proverbs 13:20

2009-09-24T12:03:00.000-07:00

Sunday morning Bailey and I were on our way to church and she didn't say a word the whole way there. We pull into the parking lot and she says "Momma, I think me and Tory are the only ones at school whose parents don't drink & smoke." I didn't know how to respond so I just told her there were probably others too. She told me it used to embarass her that I didn't drink but then she realized Tory's parents didn't either and she was ok. I told her that as christians were are supposed to be different from "the world" and that you couldn't do what others did just because that's what everyone was doing.

After church, on our way home. I asked her what she learned. She recited the memory verse Proverbs 13:20 "He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm." Wow....so the lesson she learned went right along with what we had talked about earlier!

I remember growing up and being embarassed because my dad DID drink. How things change. It is so sad that she was embarassed by what we DON'T do. It just seems like the older I get the more you have this world telling you it's ok to do this and that. People are compromising more and more. The bible is God's true and living word. There is no gray area in the bible. No where will you find...."Well, if you're dealt a bad hand YOU don't have to follow ALL of God's word, just the parts you want." If you truly believe how can you not be changed? Matthew 18:3 "And he said: I tell you the truth, unless you change and become little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."

I dread what issues we will face during the teenage years. Bailey is a smart kid and I just pray that she and Reese will always remember what they have been taught and that they can influence others in a positive way instead of being influenced negatively.

I have decided to follow Jesus....no turning back.

2009-09-16T19:49:00.000-07:00

So I've been inspired by another blog that I read, mycharmingkids.net. MckMama wrote an amazing post. Throughout the day today I kept thinking about the word salvation and a song popped in my head with that word and I can't get it out! I believe in absolute truth and regardless if someone doesn't believe Jesus died on the cross doesn't mean it's not true. I read through my journal tonight and found an entry that I was pretty passionate about at the time. I am glad to be reminded of it and thought I would share. I know, I write about the same things over and over again, but hey, I can't not do it because.... "I have decided to follow Jesus, I have decided to follow Jesus, I have decided to follow Jesus, no turning back, no turning back." (LOVE the new Selah CD and the last sentence is lyrics from an old hymn that they sing on the CD, LOVE IT!)

**Death is an inevitable reality. That fact doesn't make death any easier. But, what does make it bearable is the FACT that this- what we see here is temporary. Your relationship with God through Jesus Christ WILL determine where you will spend eternity, Heaven or Hell. I ask you, not if you believe in God, because the bible, James 2:19 says "You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that and shudder." But do you have a personal relationship with Jesus? I used to think I was a good enough person and would probably go to heaven. I was wrong! My good enough will never get me there, nor anyone else's. See, Jesus paid the ulitmate price for our sins, all we have to do is accept the gift of salvation. I used to be searching for something. Nothing I found made me happy for a long period of time. One day I was broken and I cried out to God. Jeremiah 29:11-13 is so true - "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." When you seek God you will find Him. He will change your life. II Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone the new has come." Change will come in your life and God will help you if you allow Him. He will take those desires away and you will become a work in progress.

But, let me warn you that God knows your heart. James 2:26 "As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead." I'm not saying you can earn your way to heaven but if you are truly saved, you will SEE change. Your friends change, places you go change, shows you watch change, music you listen to changes etc. It's so easy to be "changed" for an hour on Sunday. What about the rest of your week, do you live like a changed person or do you look like the world? Do you read the bible and follow what it says? James 1:22-24 " Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediatley forgets what he looks like." Pretty powerful isn't it?

Jesus Christ is real and changes lives! When you leave this earth, you can't take anything with you. I guarantee you - you will not be wishing you would have drank more, bought a better car, worked more, and so on. Eternity is something hard for us to fathom. Do you want to wait until your at that point to decide what is important? It will be too late then. God is knocking, will you open the door of your heart and let him in?***

So there you go, a little peak inside my journal. Not that this looks like a typical journal entry. I'm not sure what was going on that day but that is what I wrote. Hope everyone's week is going well!

The lost can be found

2009-08-27T11:08:00.000-07:00

It is so hard at times to know that everything happens for a reason. At times I wish we could see why. But God loves us and knows what is best. We probably couldn't handle the why any better than the current struggle. Every pain has a purpose. God has a plan for each one of us. He knows the struggles we will go through, the bad decisions we'll make, and more importantly than that, where we will spend an eternity. It may just be me, but it seems like the older I get, the more sad things happen. There are days that I just can't take watching the news or reading blogs. I just get so consumed!

I look back on my life and can see why God placed me on a certain path. I've gone through some tough times but so far I have to say it was worth it. Never thought I would say that. Even with Bailey, at times, I can understand a little, why she's had to go through some things that she really shouldn't have to deal with at her age.

Recently I shared with my Dad the dream I had about my youngest brother. I wrote a post on it back in June. It still bothers me and as a matter of fact it really bothers me that there are sooo many people out there that don't know Jesus as their Lord and Saviour. I used to be one of those people and just didn't see what the big deal was about religion/God. But, I'll tell you, when I GOT it, I GOT IT! So now, I may seem like a bible thumping, holy roller to some (yes, I've been called that) but that isn't an insult to me. We (christians) are supposed to be different than others. I believe that the Bible is God's true and living word. How can I believe that and not want to share with others what God has done for me?

Lord, I just pray for those that don't know you, that they'll come closer to knowing you today. Thank you Lord that the lost can be found!

Honeymoon story

2009-08-08T05:05:00.000-07:00

Since I haven't posted in a while I thought I would share with you the story of our honeymoon. Rick and Bubba are giving away a trip to the beach to the person with the worst honeymoon and giving them a 2nd chance at a good one. My sister has a great story too and she entered the contest too. Maybe one of us will win! Here it is:

Let me start by saying my husband and I are both horrible with directions and get lost often. We got married on April 16, 2004. We decided we would go to Gatlinburg since neither of us had never been. Strange I know. EVERYBODY had their opinion on the best way to get there. We opted for “get on X hwy and follow the signs.” Easy enough. When we reached Knoxville, we realized we must have missed a sign. Stopped, asked for directions, and was on our merry way. We get to Sevierville and there is apparently a car show going on that weekend. It took us 2 hours to go 2 miles!!!! Since we weren’t getting anywhere fast we decided we would just stay there and go into Gatlinburg the next morning. No one had rooms available and of course the rates were jacked up because of the car show. We finally found an available room with 2 single beds. At that point, whatever! Then we realized we had to eat, but the traffic was still crawling, people were sitting in chairs on the side of the road, in hotel parking lots, I guess to watch the traffic, drink adult beverages, and yell at the folks walking, since that seemed to be the best form of getting ANYWHERE! For our honeymoon, we walked across the street to CVS for dinner. Luckily, or not so lucky, our room had a microwave so we had microwave popcorn and cookies for dinner. We still tried to make the most of it and thought we would get up early, because surely a good portion of those people would be hungover and we could reach our destination with ease. Wrong!!! I guess everyone else wanted to start the day early or never went to bed, so traffic was bumper to bumper at 7:00 am!! At that point we decided it would be in our best interest to just go home. And that is just what we did!

Since our first honeymoon was not really a honeymoon we really deserve a second one……..and we do actually know how to get to the beach J

Pass it on, baby!

2009-07-10T21:21:00.000-07:00

Don't you just LOVE how God works? Through the day I know I say that so often....then I get home and can't remember to put it on my blog! I really need to get better at writing things down and be consistent. I would have so much to write about!

My latest story goes something like this. I read an amazing blog, which I'm sure most everyone reads, "Bring The Rain". Several weeks ago she mentioned a blog, (Pass it on,baby) that connects people that have baby/kids clothing to those in need. The donor ships directly to the one in need. Anyway, I added the site to my favorites. At the time there wasn't a need out there for what I had. For some reason I thought about that particular site this week and since our laptop was literally butchered by none other than Reese, I didn't have the site address and couldn't remember the name. At the time I couldn't even remember which blog mentioned it so I decided I could just google it. I searched for almost 2 hrs and couldn't find ANYTHING. The next day I decided to try again, and found it! What do you think at the top of the blog was the first size needed?? Boys clothing in the sizes I have! So, I emailed with my info.

I got a reply shortly after and I just cried. She said that moments before my email, a foster mother had emailed with the need of what I had! Crazy, just crazy! I am mailing the package tomorrow and I have never been so excited to mail something in my life! God is awesome and none of this is a coincidence! God provides and he uses little ol' me and you to fulfill his promises.

If you haven't heard of this before check it out! I have their button on the right side of my blog and this is just an awesome opportunity!

Dream

2009-06-17T19:23:00.000-07:00

Do you ever have dreams that make you wonder what the meaning behind the dream is? I am starting to have more of them and the last one was a doozy (is that a word?). Last week I dreamed by youngest brother died of alcohol poisoning. He was in rehab last year and lets just say the rehab didn't help. You can probably tell from my last post that I feel very strongly and dislike alcohol very much. I've had numerous discussions with family members that don't think there is an urgency in helping him, motivating him, and encouraging him to not drink. I'm sorry, but alcoholics can't have 1 drink. Not to mention he has a 2 yr old daughter that he is raising... the mom hasn't seen her in at least the last 18 months.

Back to the dream. I dreamed he died and when I woke up I literally FELT the sadness and I sobbed (not cried, because hey, we all know I'm a crier) yes sobbed for an hour and a half. I normally go to the gym in the morning but I couldn't pull it together enough to even do that! So, I came downstairs and prayed and I've never had such a loss for words when praying. I know God heard my heart though. I was broken, completly broken. I wondered, why did I FEEL such sadness to that capacity? Then I thought that God probably grieves for us and this dying world like that. Why the dream, why the crying, what do I need to do with this?

The following day I tried calling my brother. I couldn't get him. I tried to think of the letter I sent him 2 1/2 yrs ago. I told him how much better my life was since I accepted Christ as my Saviour. I urged him to seek God's face and although his difficulties in life would still be there, he would have help and the greatest help of all. I wonder if he ever read the letter? I remember the night I wrote it. I was pregnant with Reese and I was wide awake at 3:00am and the words came to me with such ease! No doubt that was God. So, was this dream too, something God wanted to tell me?

After all the wondering, I think I finally started to realize what I was supposed to learn. One, it is not about the alcohol, just stop with all that, and realize the only decision one can make that REALLY matters is the decision you make to accept Jesus into your life and to live for God. Really when it's all said and done that is the ONLY thing that matters. I need to stop seeing the sin in others and focus on what really matters. My brother could die and would it matter that I so despised the drinking and I told him he needed to stop? No. Would it matter that he didn't know what it took to be saved and that no one ever bothered to take the time find out if he knew? Yes. I think we assume alot of times that since we live in the bible belt that EVERYONE knows who Jesus is. We can't assume.

The lyrics to one of my favorite songs says:
"Give me your eyes for just one second,
give me your eyes so I can see everything that I keep missing,
give me your love for humanity,
give me your arms for the broken hearted the ones that are far beyond my reach,
give me your eyes for the once forgotten..........."

I want to see others the way He sees them.

The last tidbit to the story is this.......The day before the dream I bought a book. The Hiding Place, the true story of Corrie Ten Boom. I had heard about her and a little about her story. Great book!! The ending really spoke to me. Corrie and her sister were imprisoned in Germany for hiding Jews. They suffered just unimaginable things. Corrie Ten Boom told her story to many and at the end of one of her speaking engagements one of the former guards of the prison she was in came up to her. I will quote from the book because I couldn't begin to tell in my own words.

"Even as the angry, vengeful thoughts boiled through me, I saw the sin of them. Jesus Christ had died for this man; was I going to ask for more? Lord Jesus, I prayed, forgive me and help me to forgive him. I tried to smile, I strugged to raise my hand. I could not. I felt nothing, but the slightest spark of warmth or charity. And so again I breathed a silent prayer. Jesus, I cannot forgive him. Give me Your forgiveness. As I shook his hand the most incredible thing happened. From my shoulder along my arm and through my hand a current seemed to pass from me to him, while into my heart sprang a love for this stranger that almost overwhelmed me."

Corrie Ten Boom.

Wow. As I read those words I thought of my dream and how those very real feelings from the dream was God. I need to look past the sin and at the person God sees. Love them. Let God do the work, and be obedient to the things he wants me to do.

I still intend on having the salvation talk with my brother but before I can do that, I need to see him and not the sin. I am so glad we don't truly get what we deserve and that we serve a loving God that sent His only Son to die on a cross to save me from MY sins!! Amazing! If God lets me off the hook why do I continue to hang others on that same hook? I sin just the same as the alcoholic, "get over it!" I tell myself, and love these people just like those who loved me and were able to see past the sin and care enough to share the greatest and most important news ever. Thank you God!!

June 8th (and a rant I shouldn't get on)

2009-06-08T19:44:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it's been a month since I've written a blog....where does the time go? Today is Bailey's 8th birthday! Crazy, crazy that I have an 8 yr old. She has been so excited for a month about this birthday. I guess when you are a kid, you just want to be older....then when you are older you wish you were a kid again!

Sadly though, today was not a good day for her. Without going into to much info here, I'll just say two things. First, the morning started off with a phone call from her stepmom (not good since she starts the conversation with "I just thought you would want to know what's going on.") and second, once Bailey got home she told me her dad wasn't a good truth teller. So sad, but so true. However, we did go to Johny Rockets for dinner and strangers singing happy birthday to her made her day!

I have to say my peace and then I will try to stay off of this subject. I can not talk about drinking alcohol without getting very mad! I feel so passionate about not drinking that I tend to take it to the extreme. If you can't handle alcohol, don't drink!!! If you can't function and take care of your responsibilities, don't drink! If you wreck numerous vehicles due to drinking, don't drink! If it bothers your children when you drink, don't drink! If you don't want your kids to grow up to be an alcoholic, don't drink! I could go on and on but I will stop with that. I guess I just don't understand why it is so hard for people to see the damage that is caused in a family when alcohol is number one in a persons life. Oh, I forgot this one, "Jesus turned water into wine, it's ok to drink." It's not ok to get drunk, and please for the love tell me how drinking honors God??? I need to know the answer to that.

Ok, so I did get carried away and I will stop for real this time. I am praying that I can calm down on this topic. The world is so good at convincing people that was is wrong is ok. Please know what you believe and why you believe it or else the world will take you down a long hard path that leads to nothing.

The Motion

2009-05-04T11:03:00.000-07:00

I have been in a funk the last couple of weeks. You know, the kind of funk where you don't do any of the things you are supposed to do.....like reading the bible, praying, and of course other things that are much less important like cleaning house! Last week I had a great excuse to not clean.......I had a horrible crick (spelling??) in my neck that caused me to wake up in the middle of the night not able to move. Luckily after 3 visits to the chiropractor I can move and look to the left without crying. Still no excuse for not reading the bible or praying. That really stinks!

Luckily I am/was very aware that I needed to get back on the bible reading, praying train that I had fallen off of. I do not want to EVER forget what God has done for me and go back to the life I had BC (before Christ).

So, towards the end of last week I knew God was trying to tell me something. For me sometimes, I can hear a song, hear a sermon, read an email and just boo hoo.....knowing that very thing was EXACTLY what I needed at that very moment. God is just awesome like that! Friday afternoon I was in the car and heard Matthew West's song "The Motions". Yep, I teared up. I came in and wrote the lyrics on a piece of paper and hung it on the fridge. I did not want to forget those words!! So, just to show you how I knew this was what God was telling me..........Sunday morning at church a video was played and guess to what song??? The Motions, by Matthew West. Crazy!!!! I am going to try to post the song so you guys can hear how awesome it is. "I don't want to go through the motions, I don't want to go one more day, without your all consuming passion inside of me. What if I spent my whole life asking, what if I had given everything instead of going through the motions."

Of course the sermon was awesome and spoke to me. Last week I had a dream about a friend that I used to work with. I dreamed we were at a funeral and he was outside the church crying. He was saying he just didn't understand how the people in the church were so at peace, it just didn't make sense. I walked up to him and told him how to get that peace. So based on the sermon yesterday, I feel compelled to call or email this friend and tell him about the dream. I know that said friend will think I am crazy but what if he needs to hear what I have to say? What if the words I speak are an answer to prayer? Have any of you ever had a dream about someone and relayed the info? I guess I just need to pray about this situation and see what God wants me to do.....I hope I get it right!!

Click on one of the pictures at the top of my blog to watch the video (couldn't figure out how to post right here). Anywho, don't forget to scroll to the bottom of my blog to stop the music that always plays. Hope you enjoy the video as much as I have!

Swimsuit Season :(

2009-04-16T19:08:00.000-07:00

Really, after reading the title I probably don't have to say more.....but I will.

We are going to the beach for the weekend with one of my sisters, my two brothers, dad and stepmom and the "many small children" (I ~~stole~~ took that quote from Mckmama's blog, love it!) that belong to them. I'm sure we will have a blast and have many stories to share when we return.

I started packing today and thought I should try on my swimsuits to see if they were a go. I have been going to the gym for a little over 2 months now, so I expected the swimsuits from the last 2 yrs to ~~fall off~~ be a little big on me. Boy did I get a suprise.....the same!! The exact same, how does that happen!! Well, except that they were a little stretched out, so it wasn't sucking in enough for my taste. Can you say disappointed?

The one thing I dread more than finding a good fitting pair of jeans....finding a swimsuit that doesn't make me look like I'm a 32 yr old trying to be 15. Let's just be honest here, most swimsuits these days are not made for a person that has 2 children......unless you are a celebrity and can work out all day and have a personal chef to make a fabulous meal with like 10 calories...whatever.

So, I mustered up the courage to go shopping with my 2 kids in tow. Probably not a wise choice, but I was running out of time and Bailey is pretty good at giving fashion tips. (You know you need help when you look to a 7 yr old for fashion advice!)

We go to Kohls, and I was very pleased with their selection. A good bit of their swimsuits had the good ole skirt attached. Yes!!!!!

I pick out 3 and off to the dressing room we go.

I'll just say that the look on Bailey's face said it all. Ummm, that's a no on choice number 1!!! On to choice number 2........another bad look. We are in a public place so I'm not sure that I really want her opinion to be said out loud. Finally I had to ask, what is it you don't like. Another bad look.........then she says "I mean it's your legs that's all." That's all???? Do they make swimsuit pants? If so, please let me know.

I go onto choice 3 and she actually liked it!!! A flippin miracle, woohoo!!

Oh, while we are in the dressing room, Reese decided to scream, "Mommy poo pooed!". Nice, not like I was already humilated with a 7yr old that doesn't have an ounce of fat on her looking at me in total disgust, I have Reese yelling that I had pooped. Great, just great!

We check out and get in the car. I had to ask about the leg comment. I told her it was ok to be honest, but just tell me what was so bad about my legs. She says, "They are just too white." I can totally deal with that. I know fat looks better tan, but I have sworn off tanning beds. I will have to get a tan the good old fashioned way...........getting sun burned at the beach!!

Nothing like a good ol' boost to the self esteem than shopping for a swimsuit with a very honest 7 yr old!

2009-04-14T18:57:00.000-07:00

I just love Easter. Since becoming a christian, it just takes on a whole new meaning. I was overwhelmed with emotion Sunday at church. We sang an old hymn "Because He lives" and that just about caused the tears to flow (thus embarrassing Denson). Not only is that song so meaningful, but it also reminds me of my grandparents. When we were little we would go to church with them and most of the old hymns take me back to those days. How I miss my PaPa!!

It thrills my heart to see Bailey understand why we celebrate Easter......and to see her so interested in the bible. The Easter Bunny brought her a new big girl bible and she loved it!

Easter Eve I read a sermon that Charles Spurgeon preached on the Easter of 1857. Very powerful message. If you get a moment to read here is the link: http://www.spurgeon.org/sermons/0127.htm. I won't go into it too much because I could never do it justice. He speaks about the 3 people Jesus brought back to life and how each of them had been dead for different lengths of time. I'll stop there because I won't be able to explain it to where it makes sense:) Great read and I'll be reading more of Charles Spurgeon in the future.
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Most of you probably know that Denson is not a big conversationalist and doesn't like to talk to people he doesn't know.....totally out of his comfort zone. I swear that no matter where we or he goes he draws the people that just want to talk and will talk to anybody about any and everything. Last week Denson was waiting at the chiropractors office and he spotted a guy that he thought would probably be a talker.......so, he intentionally sat across the room. He said he picked up a magazine and the cover was something to do with Nascar. Well, that opened the door! Across the room the guy asked him if he liked racing and so the unsolicited conversation began.

The day after that Denson and I were at the store. He had walked away from me to get something and as he was coming back this lady stops him and asks if he knows where the kool-aid is. I heard and saw from a distance and I had to just walk away I was laughing so hard. First of all, I never would I ask a man if he knew where anything was in a grocery store. Maybe she thought he worked there I don't know. Pretty funny though.

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Easter pics.

Bailey with her easter basket. Isn't her new bible too cute??

Reese has a basket too, it's just not in view due to the 6ft alligator. He loved it!

Let's not bring the kids in it.

2009-04-07T07:37:00.000-07:00

Let me just start by saying I'm ~~really irritated~~ a little irritated about this whole gambling thing. I completely agree with Rick and Bubba and the views they expressed this morning on their show. I'm sure by now, if you live in Alabama, you've seen the commercials that several country music celebs are endorsing saying "Let the people vote." I'm pretty sure we've voted before and it did not pass.

I know, I know, this will help the schools, the kids, and yada, yada, yada. Ok, so if gambling is such a "good" thing, why do states that have a lottery or casinos have the need to set up a gamblers anonymous hotline???? Doesn't sound so good to me.

I can tell you, that it is no one else's responsibility to send MY kids to college but mine. I don't want my kids to go to college at the expense of someone else. People will win, but more than likely they won't pay bills with it or help further their kids education, no, they'll gamble it away, trying to win just a little more. There are so many stories of lottery winners that after a few years are broke and in worse shape than before they won the money. Usually, those hurt by gambling are the ones that aren't responsible gamblers (oxymoron) and are probably the same ones that aren't responsible drinkers either.......and don't get me started on that one!!

I know some cities are pushing for this too so they can pay their debt. Whose fault is it they are in debt now? What happened to the concept of if you can't afford it, don't buy it? So, now it's up to the citizens to gamble in order to pay the city's bills? That is part of the problem, no one has to take responsibility for their actions any more. It's always someone else's fault........"The bank wouldn't give me a loan", but when the bank does give someone a loan, although they can't afford it, then it's the banks fault for giving someone money they knew couldn't pay it back. When does it end!

Let's just call it what it is..........let's not bring the kids in it........again, a shared view from Rick and Bubba........Let's vote yes to gambling because we love to give our money away, neglect our kids, and bet in hopes of hitting it big. That's what we are voting for. If we really care about the kids, go tutor kids that are less fortunate, give money to buy clothing and put food on the table....that would help the kids. Oh, and if you want a lot of money, how about work for it....wow, what a concept!

"People are like stained glass windows............."

2009-04-02T18:36:00.000-07:00

Bailey said something today that really made me proud...... and made me think. I had picked her up from school and she asked if we could play outside when we got home. I told her we could, we had a little while before the storms came through. This last week has just been a rainy one. She proceeded to tell me she thought it was a pretty day. Today would not be what most people would call a pretty day by no means. So, I said well, it's been a cloudy day for sure. She said "I know, that's what made it pretty, seeing the sky through the clouds." Wow, what could I say after that?

How much better could our lives be if we could see what's beyond the clouds of life? This made me think of a saying that I just love: "People are like stained glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within." (Elizabeth Kubler-Ross) Awesome..........Really, our happiness shouldn't be based on our circumstances.

Pastor Chris preached a great sermon this past Sunday and he talked about being content. Being content is something you have to learn. This world tells you that you need more money, better car, bigger house, more, more, more. You can't take a darn thing with you when you leave this earth. When you die, there is nothing you have or can buy that will stop the one thing we will all do one day.....die. It's funny because Denson and I had just talked about contentment the week before. It is amazing how God speaks. Sometimes I wonder why I continue to use the word amazing, because God is awesome all the time and nothing He does should suprise me......but I'm still in AWE!!

Thank you for sun and rain, for what you give and take away........

2009-03-25T10:11:00.000-07:00

I heard this song today while cleaning. It is a great upbeat song and it went along with some thoughts I've had recently. The economy is bad and the building business has been down for a while now.

BUT, there are some good things that have come along with the slow time. If things hadn't been slow Denson and I wouldn't have been able to go to counseling. Really, what we thought was marriage counseling turned into individual counseling that helped both of us a lot!! Denson got and is getting to see Reese grow up. He has really been able to be a part of the day to day things that he wouldn't have had the chance to see. Also, I had an issue with depression a few months ago, to the point where I just wanted to sleep ALL day. Luckily, Denson was right there to step in and be mommy and to gently coax me into realizing I was indeed depressed. The last thing we've both realized is that we should have done things differently with money. Denson did save (thank goodness) and paid some things off. However, we didn't think a whole lot about buying this or that. I went to the grocery store and would buy what ever not even looking at the price. When things turn around, and I know they will, we will be a lot more cautious. I think of the verse Luke 16:10 "Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much."

Our hope and happiness doesn't lie in what we have here on this earth. If God wants us to walk through the valley then that is what we'll do......he is in control. That leads me into another subject.........Reese and daycare.......

When I first quit my job, we put Reese in daycare a couple of days a week so that I could help Denson with payroll (no need for that now :) ) and to have time to clean, run errands, etc. I really struggled with being at home and glad that I had an oppurtunity to adjust over this last year. Over the last few months I have literally been broken after reading certain blogs that have dealt with the loss of a child. Here, I have a healthy little boy and I'm sending him to daycare????? One night I felt God telling me that it was time for Reese to be home everyday. I talked with Denson and at that time he wanted to wait. He wasn't sure that I could handle not having an "off" day. We are trying to get rid of any un-needed exspenses and that would help. But.....again, I tried to figure it out. I have been subbing at the daycare and thought that I could work enough to pay daycare. Well, yesterday I worked 9 hours!! That was a long day! So, I'm watching other kids to pay for mine to be in daycare??? That makes a whole lot of sense!

I didn't think I would say this but working at the daycare makes me appreciate my kids and gives me more patience. I think everything has a season but God is leading me in a different direction. God has equipped me to be a better mom and with His help I will be fine.
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On a much heavier not, please pray for baby Stellan. He is the son to a blog I read: www.mycharmingkids.net. He is having problems with his heart and things are not looking good. Check out her blog when you get a chance, but please pray for Stellan and his family.

Bath time boy is back!!

2009-03-03T11:59:00.000-08:00

Reese has always liked getting a bath. He never wanted to get out and he would lay down in the bathtub after the water drained and I would have to pry him out of the bathtub kicking screaming.....that was until 2 months ago. He had an unfortunate accident that really scared him. He pooped in the tub! When he saw "it" he freaked out. Let me add that it wasn't just a little, but it was rather large. I know that is gross but I can see why the little fella may have been that scared. Anyway, he was trying to get away and the more he moved, the more it came after him. He was terrifed!

For a few weeks he would cry and would absolutely not sit down while I bathed him. He did get a little more comfortable and he stopped crying but still refused to sit down. Right after dinner, which is his usual bath time, he would start saying "Bath, no doo doo?" Every night, I would have to reassure him there was no doo doo in the bathtub. One night he passed gas, and the poor baby nearly jumped out of the bathtub. I couldn't help but laugh but he was really scared.

Finally, the last few nights, he has started sitting down again. And let me tell you, bath time boy, which is what I used to call him, is back in full effect!! We are back to the splashing so much I need a rain suit and I think it's safe to say he is easily drinking a gallon of water. I'm glad he is loving bathtime again!

Oh, and I forgot to tell this little story on my last post. I put a humidifier in his room every night to help keep him well. He loves playing with it so I have to be careful to put it in his room when I know he can't get to it. Well, the other night, he got to it and poured all the water out!! That is a lot of water! He didn't just pour it out, he was rolling around, jumping and sliding around in it. Not only was the floor soaked but he was too, and loving every minute of it. He got me again a few days later. When will I learn!!!!

Reese's creativity

2009-02-24T09:48:00.000-08:00

The last 7 days have been quite eventful around our house. Reese has reached a new level of his..........let's just call it creativity. I really had NO IDEA how different little boys were from girls. I didn't have to put anything up from Bailey. Once I told her no, she stopped and that was that. Reese on the other hand. We have had to put everything up. We have 2 gates up, child proof things on the door knobs, covers in all electrical outlets and it still isn't enough. He can still open the doors so now we have to lock them. He can also pull the plug covers out. His latest venture is to drag anything he can stand on up to the kitchen counters and have a good ol' time.
Saturday morning we were getting ready to leave and I heard a noise in the kitchen.....not good! He was pouring a bag of cerael out. Ok, I can handle that, that is actually a daily occurrence. Then I notice the cerael is lumped up in one spot, and the rocking horse doesn't look quite right. HONEY, oh no, I didn't put the honey up after breakfast!!!!

Notice the honey bear is almost empty, and the lid is off, not just opened

Poor little rocking horse will never be the same. I was suprised that the honey came up better than I thought it would. It still wasn't fun getting it up!

This was a different day. Not sure how the cerael box got on the table. Usually when he is in his high chair I am free to do a few things and don't have to worry. Wrong on this day. I heard him say "I'm hungry", which is great since he isn't talking a whole lot.................I walk in and this is what I found.

I can't really get mad, I just laugh and document. When he gets older, and if for some strange reason his kids are calm, I will produce pictures and give them some ideas!

I have one more story. I'm sorry to say I didn't take pictures because The Bachelor was coming on and hey, my priorities are right where they are supposed to be! I thought Denson was watching Reese while I curled Bailey's hair to figure out how we would fix it for dance pictures Saturday. I had to lock him out of the bathroom because he likes to turn the water on the tub on and turn it so the water is pouring out on the floor instead of in the bathtub. Or, if he's not doing that he is playing in the toilet, or coloring whatever he can find with my mascara! Ok, back to the story. I'm curling Bailey's hair and hear some noises that don't sound so great, but Denson was watching him so I didn't worry. But when I kept hearing them, I realized maybe Denson wasn't with him. I walk in the kitchen and he had pulled up a kitchen chair to the counter. I had chili on the stove cooling off (yes, it had cooled off at this point), he had gotten a glass out of the cabinet and was scooping chili out of the pot and into my coffee pot!! He had already thrown the coffee grounds onto the floor. When he sees me he attempts to pour the chili out! I caught the pot before it could get any worse. As I'm cleaning up the mess, and missing The Bachelor he is eating the coffee grounds. Bedtime came a little early that night!

I love being a mom to a little boy!!

It's been awhile.....

2009-02-19T11:00:00.000-08:00

I never know where to begin writing. Certain times during the day I say "Yeah, I need to write a blog about that.".......then I forget.........or I remember them all and feel like it would be too much info and just don't write anything.

I'll start with a funny. You know you are getting old when a guy (early to mid twenties) says "No mam" to you. Yep, I was at the gym at 5:00 am and asked this guy if he was using a piece of equipment before using it myself and he says, "no mam". I know I didn't have on make-up but come on! It doesn't help that Bailey thinks I'm old as dirt already. She asks me all the time if I grew up in the "old" days. I guess maybe to her I did grow up in the old days. My sister in law was babysitting a few weeks ago and she and Bailey got on the subject of birthdays. Bailey asked her how old she was.......when Leigh Ann told her she came back with "Wow, your older than my mom!". Isn't that great! But I am getting older everyday and that is just a fact of life.

Speaking of getting older, my Nanny has been sick. She had a stent put in and ended up having fluid around her heart and had to stay in the hospital a few more days. I stayed with her one night and we talked for hours. It was great but I was reminded that growing old is a part of life and that our bodies will wear out one day. But, we can be so thankful that this life here on earth is just temporary.

In honor of my Nanny I wanted to write a few words that make me think of her....Dippity Doo, hodge podge, sewing, home cooked food, vacation bible school, organ, clumsy, funny, loving, blessed, travel, and beauty parlor.

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Last night as I was picking up toys, I said to God, "We need a break through!" but I heard Him saying to me, "No, you don't need a break through, you just need Me." It really got me thinking and of course He is right. As long as God is first in our life, everything else will be ok. I read Psalm 118 and that really spoke to me. In particular verse 6-7 "The Lord is with me, I will not be afraid. What can man do to me? The Lord is with me; he is my helper. I will look in triumph on my enemies."

We do not need to be afraid..... sometimes that is easier said than done especially in the times we are having now. Fear is not a fruit of the spirit and we can't let fear rule our lives. Our hope and joy is in the Lord, not things or money.

You know something has gone wrong when you don't get the FREE desert!

2009-02-07T19:48:00.000-08:00

Denson and I have been cursed with bad public experiences. Gosh, it's been 5 yrs now and thank goodness we finally find them comical. Well, let me correct that first sentence....Denson has been cursed with bad public experiences, I'm just along for the ride :)

I haven't laughed that hard in awhile and my stomach will never be the same.

Denson's mom was in town and watched Reese so that we could have a date night. Bailey had a birthday party, so we dropped her off and headed off to eat. I am really just embarrased for the place so I won't mention any names.

We get there and wait about 15 minutes, which really wasn't bad. We sit down, order an appetizer.........waited.......waited....and waited some more. We didn't mind, we were have good conversation, ate the bread which wasn't that great but we still ate over half of it, and had plenty of time. Our waiter...well, let me just say he was a very nice guy but not into saying things in a professional manner. Yeah, and I'm one to to be saying that, ha! Anyway, he comes to the table and tells us "When your appetizer (can't think of the name of it) was dropped it was burnt and I was like no you gonna cook another one, so it will be another minute." Bless his heart, I am glad he cared enough to not bring us burnt food. The manager even comes out and apologizes and tells us we wouldn't be charged for it.

Next came the salad. It was not great either, but the food addicts that we are, we still ate some of it. So, then came the entree. The food didn't look so hot but who knows, looks can be deceiving.....I hoped anyway. Denson had the flatest filet mignon I had ever seen! I had filet mignon medallions (whatever that is) and really it was just half a steak cut into 4 pieces. Sadly, the rice was the best part of the meal.

Now, as I said before, we are food addicts, so we generally will eat food that isn't up to par. After a few bites we both just looked at each other and said, man we can't even eat this. The poor waiter looked really embarrased when he brought the food and even more so when he came back to ask if everything was cooked ok. He KNEW it looked and tasted bad. I know he was thinking "if these people eat this stuff there is no telling what they eat at home, I ain't ever seen cooking this bad." Denson said he didn't know if he could say the food was good if asked, just to be polite. We did look around and there were alot of people with the same look of disgust on their faces.

As we were paying the waiter came back and asked if we wanted desert and that it would be free. We said no so fast and hit the door running! You know the food was bad if WE turned down FREE DESERT......who does that??? I don't think we will eat for a few days, my taste buds are traumatized!

Citizen of Heaven

2009-02-04T12:12:00.000-08:00

I just got home from a bible study with my dear friend, Kona B. On Wednesdays, her church does an hour bible study and a lunch to take with you. When I say study, I mean study. I don't think I've ever been challenged to go this deep before, and I love it and need it. I will share some of what I learned.

Ephesians 2:19 - "Consequently you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow citizens with God's people and members of God's household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone."

Once you become a christian you are a citizen of heaven, we are strangers to this world. Here is one of many anaolgies. Even if you leave the US and go to another country, you still have the benefits of being a US citizen although you are on foreign ground. I know heaven is an awesome place and I am a citizen there. But we can experience great joy and happiness here on earth. Romans 15:13 says "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit". Just like the Lord's prayers says "....your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Another scripture, John 10:10 " ...I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." This if from the NIV and other's say "have it in abundance". None of those scriptures end in "when you get to heaven."

We are very blessed to live in the US. If my house were on fire I can call 911 and because I reside in Odenville, the Odenville FD will come to my house and put out the fire. Now, lets say my house was on fire and I ran out of the house and just waited on the FD? Well, I am a resident of Odenville but I do have to make the call. Or, what if I ran out of the burning house waited 10 minutes and then called 911? It would probably be too late. So, God's word is the fire department here. I have to read it and speak it for it to help me. Of course God knows what we need, but Matthew 7: 7 says "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you."

We have life's instruction book, the Bible, we just need to use. I know I am guilty of not picking mine up for days at a time. Life is busy and I know I need to make reading God's word a priority. How about you?

Hard Times

2009-01-25T19:19:00.000-08:00

I used to LOVE chinese food. I can't remember how long it's been, maybe 2 yrs, I just can't eat it anymore. I am convinced that most of it is cat and rat. I know, I know, sounds crazy but come on, you all know you've eaten at a Chinese place that was a little questionable. Denson and Bailey still love it so on occasion we'll get it and I will only eat a shrimp dish because I don't know that you could make rat or cat look like shrimp :) Anywho, I said all that so you will know this last Friday's events were not the norm.

Denson and I spent the day together and I thought it would make his day to eat Chinese for lunch. We go to the place in Trussville by the movie theatre (can't think of the name of it), which is pretty good and I've not heard any bad stories about it. If you know any, please don't tell me! As we pull in the parking lot, we see a couple standing by their car with a sign saying they were living in their car and needed help. Immediatley Denson wanted to stop but we agreed we would eat and think on what we were going to do. Sometimes I need a hearing aid to hear God's voice and usually go home kicking myself for not doing or saying something I know I should have done. This time, I wanted to get it right.

We walked to our car and at first I didn't see them, and I thought, oh great another missed opportunity..........but then I saw them. We drove over and I got out of the car. The lady had a very warm smile but you could also see the hurt. She said they were from Tennesee and were making their way to Pensacola for work. Her husband had to have 4 eye surgeries and they had lost everything. In his face, I saw a man that wasn't proud of holding up this sign but had to do something. I told her that we were not in that area during that time of day ever and that today was not a coincidence, but God puts people in the paths of others at the perfect time. I also told her God had a plan and we would be praying for them. We gave them some money and the lady and I hugged. I cried as we pulled out of the parking lot. I just couldn't imagine being in their place. Where was their family? Then you start thinking, what decisions did they make to get where they were? Are they really homeless and jobless? But, you know, it's not for me to judge and it's not about ME or what I've done. It's about Him, Jesus. It's about having compassion, and seeing people through His eyes. He knows their situation and He will provide. They could have needed exactly what we gave them. Just to have a little hope in a bad circumstance.

Here recently you hear of all of these companies laying off lots of people. My dear friends at Compass were told Friday layoffs would be made, they just didn't know who yet. In this day and time nobody is exempt from looking the unthinkable in the face.

We need to pray for this economy, the people who have and will lose their jobs. We also need to look for God in all of this mess. He will continue to provide in miraculous ways. Denson and I have seen it time and time again. But we also have to realize that sometimes our prayers aren't answered in the ways that we want them answered, we just have to TRUST that we are going to be ok.

Lastly Philippians 4: 12-13 says " I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength."

Scarfs!

2009-01-21T12:17:00.000-08:00

I know this is exciting news and everyone will really want to know this but I am now a fan of THE SCARF. I am always so far behind on fashion. I usually say "I will never wear that!" and then when it's about to go out of style, I then start liking it and get in on it at the end of the trip. I think I may be in the middle of this one, we'll see.

One of the blogs I follow, Big Mama, and is to the right of my page (check it out when you have time)made a video on different ways to wear a scarf. Christine happen to be staying the night that night and so she got her scarf (yeah, she is already on board with the fashion) and demonstrated in person the proper ways to wear it. LOVED IT!! I vowed that very night I would become a scarf person. So, after reading another blog I learned that WalMart had scarfs for $5.00!! I happened to have a 25.00 gift card to WalMart so guess who got 4 new scarfs.....yep me!!

Every shirt I own is black, gray, or white. Now I can have a different look and still wear ole trusty black! Can you tell I'm excited?

I really didn't think I would get THIS addicted to the blogging world. There are some really good blogs out there and I am hooked for sure!

Oh my darling, oh my darling, oh my darling clementine!

2009-01-17T19:05:00.000-08:00

Do I really even need to explain? I guess I do. This is Reese with the clementine's I bought ON SALE! You can't even find them year round, so I love it when they are in season and on sale.

I was folding clothes in peace and quiet........clue number one something was wrong. I even finished folding them AND put them away.........still quiet........I should've known trouble was brewing. I walk into the dining room and he had the clementines with forks in them walking around. He was quite proud and entertained.

I couldn't even get mad. I had NO idea the trouble little boys could get into. I'm sure I will still be suprised at the trouble he will get into in years to come. If ruining my oranges is the worst of it I'll be happy!!

Hodge Podge

2009-01-09T18:52:00.000-08:00

I wasn't sure what Hodge Podge meant so I looked up the meaning: any jumbled mixture;mess;medley. Yep, that's what I'm writing about tonight, a mixture of things. Usually when I hear that word I think of my grandmother. She was always making things and I can remember her buying tons of hodge podge! Can't remember how or what she used it for but I sure remember she had lots of it.

First, I want to commend Denson on how much he has grown this past year! He is so humble and would never toot his own horn but I'll help in out.
1. He went to family gatherings, way more than one, and was happy about it. We didn't even leave early!!
2.Since I am helping at church more, he has had to go into worship by himself. Normally, he would just stay home.
3. He agreed to lead our Community Group this last week since our "leader" was out of town. Even though only 1 couple showed we had a great time.
4. He knows when God is speaking to him.
5. Oh, and he helped me teach the 2 yr old class at church every other Sunday.
6. He is a great dad and takes care of the kids gladly when needed.
7. He is a wonderful step-dad and takes time to spend time with JUST Bailey.

This last week he went shopping for jeans with me. Now that may not be a big deal to some but for me......shopping for jeans is a BIG ordeal. Not once did he say "How much longer?" After that we had lunch together. THEN we get home and I realized I had lost my cell phone!!! This is the 3rd phone I've had to replace in less than a year. He didn't say a word, we just got in the car and got a new phone. That is love right there. He never said one cross word. Can't say that I would have handled it that well.

Here is another Bailey story. We were doing one of her devotionals and it was about Hezekiah. We talked about how you have to get advice/counsel from wise people. I asked her who was a wise person she could talk to......she thought for a moment and said "I don't know any wise people." Wow, the parents already aren't wise? I thought we had a few years for that. But, I explained a little more and gave her an example and then she understood. So, for now, I am "the wise person" she can talk to.

...........How do you say goodbye..........A friend of mine told me about a friend of hers a few months ago that had cancer. I had been following her story on caring bridge. She was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 6 months pregnant with her 2nd child. Very, Very sad story. She is a believer. Her story was even featured on Fox 6 news. She had been going to MD Anderson in Houston for experimental treatment. After Christmas she took a turn for the worse and is expected to pass away at any moment. Having 2 kids under 5........how do you say goodbye to them and how do they say goodbye to her? I've wondered if I would want to know when I would die or not know at all.........How hard would goodbye be and how hard would it be for your loved to not get that goodbye. Luckily this place is not our eternal home. How awesome will it be to be in heaven and have no worries, fears, or tears! I watched a Barbar Walter's special the other night about Patrick Swayze. He is dying of cancer too. You know, it is so true that God won't bring you to something that you can't handle. It always seems that people dying have such a peace and calmness to them. To be able to love God and not be angry at Him the entire time they are suffering. God is great all the time and all the time God is great! What would we do without Him?!?!?

Ok, for a more uplifting story........sorry if this is too long!!! I am absolutely addicted to Facebook. It is just too neat. Any who, one of my teachers from high school added me as a friend. I looked at his profile and he and his family are missionaries in Washington on an indian reservation. His blog is http://www.sacredroadyakama.blogspot.com/, check it out when you can. They are doing an amazing job there. They are planting a church so be in prayer for them. It's cool that we attend a church that was planted 2 yrs ago. This world needs God more than ever and we don't have to leave the country to share the gospel. There are hurting people everywhere. I pray the lord will give us oppurtunities to share His love with the hurting. Give us his eyes, and open our hearts to his word and voice.

Romans 12:2

2009-01-01T17:58:00.001-08:00

God is always teaching us things. Some lessons are easier than others. There are times that he has to teach me the same lessons more than once. Thank God for my friend Kona who is always quick to tell me I know the answer and know what to do. I guess we all like a little pity party sometimes, but what good does that do? God has given us the Bible, and places people in our life's at just the right time to help us with our journey.

Romans 12:2 says "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will.

Then enemy loves to attack our minds. The world loves to tell us what is right and that we can compromise our beliefs when we feel like it. But, the word of God says "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world." When you feel tempted, think of what your life was like before Jesus. Is it worth it......not at all.

I know 2009 will be a great year. We should always be striving to learn more, step up our game and become a threat to satan. Be a light to a world that needs it now more than ever!!

Christine's Story

2008-12-27T19:32:00.001-08:00

I knew that I wanted to write about Christine's story but wasn't sure when the right time would be. I should have known that all I had to do was wait for God to lay it on my heart and he did. As I was reading a blog I follow, I read another heart breaking story of an unborn baby going to heaven. Also, with Christmas being this last week, I've really prayed for all the families that have lost loved ones this year. I know this was not an easy time for them and my thoughts always seems to turn towards those that are hurting. I pray for God's comfort and peace and know that only He can heal the broken hearted.

My younger sister Christine became pregnant in 2005. We were all so excited! She was and still is petite so her little baby bump poked on out. We talked about her pregnancy and the way she was feeling a good bit. I remember her saying that she felt alot of pressure and asked if that was normal. I didn't experience that but every pregnancy is different. She mentioned the pressure to her doctor, who in turn told her it was normal.

Around 19 weeks......her water broke. She went to the hospital and was told there wasn't anything they could do and that she would have to deliver the baby. The baby's lung were not developed at this point so there would be no chance of survival. We were all devastated. How could this happen? What was wrong and could this have been prevented??

I got the call between 11:00 and 12:00 that night she had delivered. The next morning I was so sad and I cried out to God, "Please if there is something I need to read PLEASE show it to me!" I opened my bible and it opened to I Samuel. I had only been a Christian about 10 months so in no way was I familiar with this story. As I read this wonderful story I could not believe what I was reading!! I cried tears of joy because I knew Christine would have a baby one day. I shared this with Christine a few weeks later.

There was nothing the doctors could tell Christine as far as why this had happened. I looked up PROM (Premature Rupture of the Membranes) online. I was shocked at how often this happened. I read so many stories of Mom's that experienced the same thing. Why couldn't anyone give these grieving Moms an answer? At that time she was going to a doctor in Cullman. We talked alot and she decided she thought it would be best to find another doctor in Birmingham. My friend and coworker suggested her doctor, Dr. Banks. She called Dr. Banks office and spoke to a nurse right away. They were very caring and wanted to help. They actually had a cancellation and was able to see Christine that week. This was the first sign she was where she needed to be.

A few months after losing the baby, Christine started bleeding pretty bad. So bad that it scared her enough to call the paramedics. Her vitals were ok and they suggested she go to the ER in Bham. Everything checked out so she went home. She did call the doctor to make an appointment to have this situation checked out. The day of the appointment, she was eating lunch and the bleeding happened again. Her clothes were soaked so when she got to the doctors office they had to get a wheelchair to get her in.

Dr. Banks did alot of research and finally determined what the problem was. Now, between him and another doctor in his practice they had only seen this in ONE other patient. Sign number 2 she was in the right place. She was diagnosed with AVM ( arterio vascular malformation). She had an artery in her uterus that was feeding ALOT of blood. When the mass of blood got to a certain point, it caused her to hemmorhage, thus the large amount of blood loss.

Luckily, the uterus has more than one source of blood flow. Dr. Banks would be able to perform surgery that would cut off the blood flow of that artery. He had not performed this surgery before but was confident. The risk would be that if he couldn't get the artery to quit bleeding they would have to take her uterus out completely. The day of the surgery, most of the family was there. I remember going to the chapel at the hospital and praying as hard as I'd ever prayed before.

The surgery was a success!!! Since this surgery was rare, her surgery was put in the New England Medical journal. How cool is that?!?!?

Had Christine not lost the baby, and with this medical condition, both she and the baby could have died. We could see maybe why this happened and could be thankful.

After healing from surgery, Christine became pregant again. Dr. Banks kept a close eye on her. He sewed her cervix shut at 13 weeks and was pretty much on bed rest from that point on. On September 20th, 2007 Christine gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, Charli Nicole Roberson. Thank you lord!

I want to also add that during the time Christine was being diagnosed with AVM I kept hearing the story in Luke 8: 43-50. This was about the woman with a bleeding problem that was healed just by touching Jesus' cloak. I had a friend that knew about the problem and called me one evening with this same scripture. I knew again, that God would heal her and he did.

God's timing is perfect.

Miracle Baby - Charli

Christmas

2008-12-26T19:30:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday Jesus!

This is Christmas morning, the kids had birthday cake for breakfast.

Bailey and Reese making the cake.

Bailey and Reese

I thought I would post a picture of the cake we made. The kids really enjoyed having cake for breakfast! The Christmas Eve service was nice. Poor Denson only got to see about 2 minutes of it. Reese didn't last long at all!!

Bailey got up around 5:30 and luckily I was able to talk her into waiting another hour. I thought for sure Reese would be up by then but he wasn't! We went ahead and let her open her gifts. As soon as she was done Reese got up. It worked out better that way so we could video tape each of them. My Mom and Step-dad, and Denson's Dad and step-mom came over that morning. We had lots of fun and everyone seem to enjoy all the gifts they received!!

Eventful Day!!

2008-12-18T21:10:00.000-08:00

About mid way through the day I had a couple of little stories I wanted to share. Around 5: 00 we went & grabbed something to eat from Milo's and headed out to look at Christmas lights....in the rain. That was ok, we had fun. We get home, I'm baking cookies, Bailey is sweeping the foyer and I hear her say, "Momma, Reese is throwing ornaments down the stairs!" I sorta rolled my eyes, and wanted to get one more batch of cookies in the oven before I attempted to get him to stop. But, I heard a loud bang and Bailey scream. I looked down the stairs and saw Reese's little red stool, and took off for Bailey. Denson reached her first. Her hands were covering her head at first but when she moved them, I saw blood. I didn't panic at first and thankfully Denson stayed calm. We got the blood contained and I went to move her hair and didn't like what I saw. That's when I lost it a bit. Denson and I looked at each other and he quietly said, "You need to take her to the doctor." Bailey flipped, saying she didn't want stitches. I get her in the car and off we go.

Oh, and Reese was put in his bed while we tended to Bailey. Denson said when we left Reese knew something was wrong. He had his bottom lip poked out and kept crying "Bayee".

I decided to take her to the Urgent Care in Trussville. Luckily they are open until 9:00 and we got there a little after 8:00. Bailey had to get 3 stitches and she handled it very, very well. Bless her heart!!

Now for my funny stories: Last night Reese was being quiet.......which is usually a BAD sign! I look in the living room and he is sitting on the couch with Bailey's tap shoes on and playing with a toy drill. I couldn't find the camera or else there would be pictures! I think he may be a little confused, or he hangs with his sister too much.

One more................

Today, he brought me a ribbon and apparently he thought it was a belt. I tied it around his waist in a bow. I told him to look in the mirror and he turned around (back side facing the mirror) and looked over his shoulder at himself. He looked just like me!!! I guess I check out that side more so than the front:) I couldn't wait to show Denson so when he got home we went through the same scenario and he did it AGAIN! Poor baby needs to spend a week with just Daddy.

Hopefully tomorrow will be less eventful or at least not ending with a trip to Urgent Care!!

Have you looked at the Moon lately?

2008-12-13T19:34:00.000-08:00

Friday night, December 12th our power went off. Normally I wouldn't care but I was in the middle of making 310 sausage balls! I had already planned on going to the store to get tons of ice to put in the cooler to salvage all my hard work. Anyway, I looked out the window to see if our neighbors lights and street lights were off, and yep, they were. But, it was so bright outside!! I could see everything so easily. The moon was unbelievably bright. The power came back on and I continued cooking. At that point not thinking much about the moon I got online and there happened to be a story about the moon....how crazy. Last night the moon was the brightest and largest of 2008. Looking at it tonight, it is still pretty darn bright!

This made me think of the star in the east that led the Wise Men to Jesus after he was born. I can just see them walking in light, in the middle of the night. I wonder what was going through their mind? To know that the King of Kings had arrived!! It's easy for us to get excited, we've read about and seen the great things he has done, the lives he's changed, what he's done for us, but to not REALLY know...I just wonder what they thought. But at the same time, this STAR led them to Him. They didn't have a map, mapquest, or directions. So, I would imagine that being led directly to Jesus by a star,they probably did know this was a very special birth. In my study bible it says the star was not an ordinary star, planet or comet. Wow, that means it was probably way bigger and brighter than the brightest and largest moon of 2008.

Christmas is such a magical time of year, and it's not because of Santa :) I get teary eyed thinking of Jesus's birth. To know he was born to save the world from sin, and how grateful I am for that! My favorite part of the Christmas story is when the angel appeared to the shepherds. Luke 2 :10-12 But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Saviour has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

I love that the angel gave them a sign that they would have no doubt this was Jesus. I love it now that we still get signs today. There is nothing better than confirmation, and the peace you receive when doing something you know God wants you to do.

Jingle Jam is tomorrow and I can't wait!! Bailey has done a great job rehearsing and maybe, just maybe I can get through the program without crying :)

Christmas Memories

2008-12-11T18:43:00.000-08:00

Everyone has certain memories that come to mind around this time of year. I love reflecting and reading others' memories as well (thanks Meg!). Here we go:

My first memory is of my grandmother making candy for what seemed like weeks before Christmas. She made fudge, divinity and others that I can't clearly recall. I didn't like any of that stuff but it just seemed like home to see her in the kitchen.

When we were young we always went to to Nanny and PaPa's on Christmas Eve. I LOVED getting together with everyone and it seems that at the end of the party someone always pointed to the TV to show where Santa was at and we better get home and in the bed fast! I Sure miss those days and miss my PaPa!

Every year we had a real tree. When I say REAL tree, we didn't go anywhere to buy it, we walked in the woods behind our house and cut it down. It wasn't the best of trees some years but it was our tree. Also, it seems like most of our ornaments were homemade. (Do you remember that Karen?) I wish we could find those, but I'm sure they are long gone by now.

This one may not be a good memory, but it is a memory. The Christmas after our parents divorced was different. We all needed clothes and that is what we got. Christine broke down crying asking where the toys were. (Maybe that's why she married Micky, he has enough toys for all of us!) As a parent now, I know that was hard on my dad but he did the best he could. After all, we were still more fortunate than others, we may not have had what we wanted but we had what we needed.

Ok, enough of that, now for a funny one. My Aunt June went to work and left the Christmas decorating up to my Uncle Ricky. She got home and was impressed with what he had done. She looked towards the kitchen and she had these Santa shaped cups that spelled N_O_E_L......except that on this day they spelled L_E_O_N. She corrected the layout and my Uncle said "I was wondering who Leon was." To this day, when I see anything with Noel on it I think of them:)

We always had some much fun going to my Mom's for Christmas. We always had good food but I always looked forward to the shrimp dip, her homemade ranch dressing, and green onions. I've never had any of those 3 things that are better than hers. Also, we all, always had an envelope on the tree with some green in it!

I am ALL about traditions and starting them for my family. Denson always laughs and tells me what a dork I am. Deep down I know he loves it too! We read about the Birth of Jesus from the bible. We get to open one present. This year and years to come we will attend the Christmas Eve service at church. After that , we are coming home and baking a birthday cake for Jesus. Christmas morning, we will sing Happy Birthday and have cake for breakfast. I will be cooking a real breakfast too. I wish I were more creative but this works for us.

One more thing......I loved watching the Christmas cartoons that came on, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Frosty the Snow Man, and Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Remember that back then you couldn't watch cartoons everyday, just on Saturdays and on Holidays.

That about it I guess............Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight!!!

December 10, 2004

2008-12-10T19:08:00.000-08:00

I just had a God moment and thought I would share. I was on the computer looking at the weather, and I starting thinking about Steven Spears. Steven was my step-dads nephew. I looked at the calendar and realized today was the 4 yr anniversary of his death. On December 10th, four years ago, many lives were changed forever. Steven was shot while driving he and his wife home from a birthday party.

I will never forget the moment I heard the news. We were actually at my sister Karen's house and had spent the night. As I was getting up she told me the news. I was shocked to say the least. My heart ached for his wife, mom, brothers and of course my step-dad. I remember going to the viewing and seeing a line around the church and out the door. I remember getting out of the car wondering how I would handle this, and actually feeling a sense of peace. That was odd to me because at that time Jesus was not my Lord and Savior. That was just the beginning of my journey.

A few days later, I was at work sitting at my desk, asking myself "Does God really exist? Is heaven real?" At that moment I felt an overwhelming urge to pray, which I did. Again, I was not a Christian so praying was not my thing. About an hour later God answered my prayer!! A co-worker, which I had not been friends with approached me and another girl. She started telling us about her Dad passing away about a month earlier. She told us about his visions of heaven. That was awesome, but the eye opener was, the things he saw were EXACTLY like a vision my PaPa had before he died. I fought back the tears and knew God was telling me "I am real, there is a place called Heaven and you better get on board!" My life as I knew it was changed forever.

I remember going home so excited to tell my husband about my experience. He wasn't much interested, because we had not been getting along and I don't blame him. However, a week later he says to me "Your serious aren't you, you've really changed." Thank God he was on board with me and we started attending church as a family. I could not get enough of reading the Bible!

Bailey was 3 at the time and had not been raised in church. Not too long after my life changing event, I felt an overwhelming urge to email my step-day because I knew he was still having a hard time. The whole time I was emailing him the tears were flowing!! Bailey came into the room and asked me what was wrong. I told her nothing, I was ok. She said "Are you talking about Jesus?" I started crying even more and told her yes, yes I was. How did she know who Jesus was? I was amazed at her and still today, she amazes me with the spiritual things she says.

I said all of that to say this......This day will always be a reminder that Steven is in heaven and missed by many. But I can also say that this is a great reminder of how God saved me! God is always trying to get our attention, we just have to listen. Sometimes we have to be at a low in order to hear him. God doesn't want any of his children to die an eternal death. Thank God for his grace, love AND for eternal life! I needed a reminder today of what He's done for me. Thank you Lord!!

First Post

2008-12-09T20:40:00.000-08:00

So, it took me a little while to somewhat figure this out. It took me 40 minutes to figure how to add music....may be days before I post pictures:) A work in progress.

I have been so inspired by reading blogs lately. After everyone's in bed, and it's just me, I read blogs and I'm loving it! I have to say Bailey's 1st teacher, Mrs. Lowry got me interested. I started by reading her blog and then the blogs she had posted on her page. I have to admit, one afternoon, I sat for 2 hours reading "Bring the Rain", and I cried for most of those 2 hours.

It is so sad to hear of all the trajedy, loss, and just heartbreaking stories that happen more than we care for them to. It is probably rare that you find someone that hasn't been affected by a trajedy. I never knew how common miscarriages were until my sister had 2. Those were bad enough but the heartbreaking one was her water breaking at 19 weeks. I will post on the whole story later. God had his hand in the situation and protected my sister, which we didn't find out until later. My heart ached for her and I can only imagine how SHE felt.

II Corinthians 1:3-4 "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." When God comforts us, we are to use our experience to comfort others. I like the saying "Every Pain has a Purpose". What a blessing to be blessed, AND be a blessing to someone else!

I really feel like hearing these stories and seeing how God is working and how we truly draw strength from him....that is so encouraging! You never know what someone is going through, went throught, or will be going through. To know no one is alone in this walk is great.

My goal for this blog is to write about the ways God is working in my life and around me. I also feel like writing is therapeutic. With a 7 yr old and almost 2 yr old, I will probably post some of our comical stories as well. God is great and he makes all things new :)