Swimsuit Season :(

I thought this post from last year was worth posting again. I've not even thought about a swimsuit this year and after reading this again I may just wait until a miracle happens and I lose 20 lbs!!

Really, after reading the title I probably don't have to say more.....but I will.

We are going to the beach for the weekend with one of my sisters, my two brothers, dad and stepmom and the "many small children" (I stole took that quote from Mckmama's blog, love it!) that belong to them. I'm sure we will have a blast and have many stories to share when we return.

I started packing today and thought I should try on my swimsuits to see if they were a go. I have been going to the gym for a little over 2 months now, so I expected the swimsuits from the last 2 yrs to fall off be a little big on me. Boy did I get a suprise.....the same!! The exact same, how does that happen!! Well, except that they were a little stretched out, so it wasn't sucking in enough for my taste. Can you say disappointed?

The one thing I dread more than finding a good fitting pair of jeans....finding a swimsuit that doesn't make me look like I'm a 32 yr old trying to be 15. Let's just be honest here, most swimsuits these days are not made for a person that has 2 children......unless you are a celebrity and can work out all day and have a personal chef to make a fabulous meal with like 10 calories...whatever.

So, I mustered up the courage to go shopping with my 2 kids in tow. Probably not a wise choice, but I was running out of time and Bailey is pretty good at giving fashion tips. (You know you need help when you look to a 7 yr old for fashion advice!)

We go to Kohls, and I was very pleased with their selection. A good bit of their swimsuits had the good ole skirt attached. Yes!!!!!

I pick out 3 and off to the dressing room we go.

I'll just say that the look on Bailey's face said it all. Ummm, that's a no on choice number 1!!! On to choice number 2........another bad look. We are in a public place so I'm not sure that I really want her opinion to be said out loud. Finally I had to ask, what is it you don't like. Another bad look.........then she says "I mean it's your legs that's all." That's all???? Do they make swimsuit pants? If so, please let me know.

I go onto choice 3 and she actually liked it!!! A flippin miracle, woohoo!!

Oh, while we are in the dressing room, Reese decided to scream, "Mommy poo pooed!". Nice, not like I was already humilated with a 7yr old that doesn't have an ounce of fat on her looking at me in total disgust, I have Reese yelling that I had pooped. Great, just great!

We check out and get in the car. I had to ask about the leg comment. I told her it was ok to be honest, but just tell me what was so bad about my legs. She says, "They are just too white." I can totally deal with that. I know fat looks better tan, but I have sworn off tanning beds. I will have to get a tan the good old fashioned way...........getting sun burned at the beach!!

Nothing like a good ol' boost to the self esteem than shopping for a swimsuit with a very honest 7 yr old!

I'm finding myself at a loss for words.

I had a moment today.................while folding clothes. One of my least favorite things to do and there He was, right there with me! I am trying very hard not to watch a lot of TV so I decided to listen to music and "Word of God Speak" by Kutless came on and the tears were flowing before I knew it.
Chorus:
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That Your in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your Holiness
Word of God speak

God is everywhere and in everything. At times that is hard to see. As I've mentioned before, a good friend and I are doing a bible study on Esther. Esther is the only book in the bible that never mentions God.......but, He is all over it!

Psalm 139: 7-10 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand, will hold me fast.

I think I've mentioned this before, but I think it's worth saying again. Things we are able to get away with (not feel convicted about) now, may be the things that we can't get away with (feel convicted) months down the road. We are always being pruned, which will allow us to grow spiritually.

John 15:1-2 I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.

There are 3 areas I feel that are being pruned right now:

1. Time- The way I spend my time - mostly watching TV. Most shows I watch bring nothing of value to my life. The world likes to tell us "You've worked hard today, the kids are in bed, you deserve it, watch whatever you want." Trust me, I have a lot of work to do but I have cut out 3 shows so far and I don't even miss it!

2. Faithfulness - Remain faithful in giving ESPECIALLY during the hard times. I came across Hebrews 10:35-39 on 3-5-10 and I had marked in my bible on 3-5-06. Exactly 4 yrs later! Verse 35 - So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. God will provide and the bible doesn't say to give if you feel like it or if things are going well.

3. Stay Strong - Satan will always be working to bring you down. He knows what works and will use that against you time and time again. There are certain lies that get in my head from time to time and I refuse to let my thoughts go there anymore!!

God is there, even when we find ourselves at a loss for words, and the funny thing is, it's ok.

Same Post - Different Words :)

So I've had several different topics on my mind to blog about lately. Obviously I've procrastinated quite a bit. As usual.....when I sit down to write, I draw a big fat blank so this post may or may not make sense :)



In the last few weeks, conversations I've had with my hubby have really stood out. I love that I can talk to him about things that are floating around in my head and for the most part he gets what I'm trying to say and adds to it. Now, he could just be being nice but either way I feel like getting those thoughts out verbally help to process things.



From our conversations and sermons Pastor Chris has preached I've come to the realization that being a christian, or telling someone you are a christian, really has the potential to cause a good bit of harm or (hopefully) alot of good. For some people, they may encounter very few christians in their life. What that person says, does, or doesn't do is what becomes their idea of what all christians are like. Sure, we are not perfect by any means. If an alocoholic sees a "christian" drinking, would that make that person think that it might be ok? If "the world" sees us and can't really see a difference in how they are living and how you are, then what would their incentive be to become a christian? I think God is more concerned about us being holy and leading others to him than how we want to live. I don't know about you, but doing things the way I've wanted them haven't worked out real well.



D.L. Moody wrote: " It is a great deal better to live a holy life than to talk about it. We are told to let our light shine, and if it does we won't need to tell anybody it does. The light will be it's own witness. Lighthouses don't ring bells and fire cannons to call attention to their shining - they just shine."

Wow, that is pretty powerful!



Moving on to a couple of other revelations. I looked back the other day on when I became saved. I had been in church on and off my whole life, knew what I needed to do but never did it. I can recall realizing I NEEDED a saviour. I truly could not do the thing we call "life" here another second on my own. Days later I also realized there was NOTHING I could do to earn my salvation. "Isn't that crazy?" I thought. So, I know that there is nothing I or anyone else can do to get a person to accept Christ. But, we can plant seeds and be an example and I guarantee you when someone comes to the place that they need a saviour they will think of you and what you've said. I know I thought of a man that I used to work with that was a good christian example. No matter what was going on at work, no matter where the office Christmas parties were, he always acted the same. He invited me to church several times, although I never accepted. But, when I finally GOT IT, I wanted to let him know that I did and I appreciated all the kind words he spoke and the example that he was.

So after having the above conversation with Denson, we started talking about all the things that had to happen for us to be in the place we are at now. First, I wasn't a believer and the fact that God was busy working things out even when I could care less is just amazing. Second, when my "light" was turned on, luckily I had a supportive spouse and we starting growing together. Since I had been married before and didn't have that luck when I did try to do "church" - I know that mine and Denson's marriage was meant to be. We sure didn't consult Him before getting married!

One last thing, a good friend and I have started the Beth Moore study on Esther. It is amazing!! I had heard of her before but never read any of her books. Well, this study has made me a Beth Moore fan. We will start week 2 tomorrow and I can't wait! Hope everyone has a great week!

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. Colossians 3:2

Do you ever have dreams that you wish you could somehow record and go back and watch? I have and last night was one of them. I dreamed about my PaPa! It was weird but it was like I had gone back in time before he passed away and he was telling me things I needed to know to live a good life. It was like I knew he was gone but I wanted to soak up as much of what he was telling me as I could. Of course I can't remember everything but what did stick out in my mind was him telling me not to worry about the things of this world....there was nothing "here" that could make me happy. In the inside I was thinking, "Yes! I know that now and you would be so proud!" It was great to see his face and remember him. Gosh, he's been gone 14 yrs and I still miss him so much!

He was such a wise, Godly man. I wish I really could go back and ask him questions. I would ask him to tell me about his life before God and what led him to Him (my nanny has where he had written it down, we just need to find it!). I would get more details of his dream/vision of heaven. Just plain ol' advice for life.

I wish I could tell him what an impact he had on my life. Unfortunately I didn't realize it until he was gone. Really, him telling about his dream of heaven saved me. It took a long time but I never forgot it.

The things we say and do now......we never know how God will use that to impact lives years down the road.

One last thing. We had community group tonight and the 2nd scripture we read was Colossians 3:1-11. The first couple of verses said "Since then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." I don't think it was a coincidence that I had that dream and THEN this scripture was part of our study tonight. God is so awesome!

New Years Resolution

I have felt really convicted here lately on what I watch on TV. I have been so quick to want to get the kids to bed on certain nights so I can watch one of my shows. At the same time, I'm putting off other important things, much more important things like spending time with God.

Do things you hear ever stick with you and you feel like you'll never forget them? I have a few and one that keeps popping in my mind is something I heard Joyce Meyer say some years ago. She was talking about growing spiritually and that things you were able to do last year, are the same things you won't be able to the next. I have found that to be so true! I remember the first time I drank alcohol after being saved...........I KNEW that was something I could not do anymore. I think back on things that I've done and just cringe at the thought. No way could I do those things at this point in my life. But, I am so thankful that I didn't have to have it all together in order to be able to attend church and worship God. He accepts us just as we are and as a matter of fact He is the one that gives us the strength to kick bad habits. He even takes desires away for the not so good things and gives us new desires.

One of my goals this year is to memorize one bible verse a week. I had a conversation with a family member about a week ago. She was very sad and told me of an experience she had and that after that, she quit praying that God would just let her die. So, hours after the conversation I wake up thinking of the verse that says:" The thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full." John 10:10. I so wish I could have given her that scripture. Life is tough and is just not fair at times but we are not supposed to live a defeated life. Of course I had to look up the scripture because I did not have it memorized. With that being said I remembered a verse that says something about hiding God's word in your heart......(after searching for 20 minutes) ok, couldn't find that but maybe this is what I was thinking Ephesians 6:10-18. This talks about putting on the full armor of God. How can I do that without knowing the scripture?

Sometimes it is hard to know what God is telling us or wants us to do but the more we stay in the word and pray He reveals himself. It is so awesome how confirmation from others that have no idea what's going on can be used by God and not even know it.

So, I guess you could say I have 2 New Year's resolutions: 1.Quit watching so much junk on TV(not everything is junk but alot is)! 2. Memorize scripture.

I know 2010 will be a great year, I just know it!

Divine appointments.

Shortly after I became a Christian, I remember a friend of mine telling me that I would learn that there is no such thing as a coincidence. Oh my goodnes was he right! I look back now and see how if certain things hadn't happened I wouldn't be where I am today.

I think I've written before that I've been in situations and realized that I was supposed to be in that place at that time, no doubt. Those are the times that I KNOW just how much God is in control and just how real HE is. It's amazing how God is working in and around us and we don't always see it.

About 2 months before I found out I was pregnant with Reese, I went to the doctor for my yearly check-up. In the exam room while I was waiting, a magazine was sitting there. On the front of it was Reese Witherspoon and it said "Sweet Reese". We had already been talking about names and I just got chills....wondering if that was a sign of what was to come. The next day, Denson and I were looking at a house that was under construction. There were mirrors that were lableled with their kids names and what name was on one of them......yep, Reese! I knew that would be our baby's name.

I truly believe that the people we encounter, places we go, are no accident. Have you ever gotten the feeling you should say something to a person? I have and I don't act on it like I should. I guess in fear that the person will think I'm crazy, but I always feel horrible when I miss the opportunity. I will say I have not always gotten the response I've expected either. But, I am just the messenger and God is still at work!

I am so not good with words but I pray that God will give me the words to speak to people I encounter and the courage to not back down.

Be careful little feet where you go for it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow...

Little ones are so funny.......they want to do everything they see others do, especially their parents. Reese mocks EVERYTHING Denson does. He pretends to build houses, talk on the phone, cut the grass. He also pretends to do things I do like cook, clean, and get on to Bailey. He repeats everything he hears and I do mean everything. THAT has been a not so good reminder when you hear your 2 yr old say butt hole! Oh, and he wants to do whatever Bailey is doing, like singing, dancing, and even homework. I'm sure he'll get out of the last one when he starts school.

This last week Reese has acted like he was the one that had back surgery. It really got me thinking that what we, as parents, do really, really affects how our kids grow up and perceive things. Practice what you preach is what we should do. How can we tell our kids not to do something when they see us doing it? It makes me sad to think of children that grow up not hearing about God, seeing there parents do not so nice things, think it is ok for a man to beat a woman, have zero respect for themselves or others and many other things.

Anyone can bring a life into this world but that doesn't make them a parent. What a precious gift God has given to so many that treat the gift worse than some treat a dog. I just don't understand.

So, I think this is a challenge to me and others to be that example that some may never see anywhere else. I know I need to be a better example to my kids too. Some of the things I hear Bailey and Reese say sound just like me! Sometimes it's funny and other times I think "Wow, I sound like that?"

I'll say this last thing. I think it is super important who our kids look up to and are around. They are paying attention even when we have no clue. For example, Reese picked up Bailey's bible a few nights ago and said he was Pastor Chris and he was reading the new old testament. He even prayed after the story! It was the sweetest thing he's ever done. I pray that he and Bailey always look up to people that live their life for God.